Grieving Through The Holidays

I was 15 when my dad died. Learning to live life without him has been extremely hard. The holidays were always my favorite as a kid and my dad made them feel super special. We would watch the Thanksgiving Day parade together or decorate the house and he always put a smile on my face. Since he has been gone the spirit of the holidays can make missing him almost unbearable. Over the past few years though, I have figured out some ways to cope and keep the magic alive.  

Keep Up With Traditions

My family always used to put the Christmas decorations up on Thanksgiving. So now every year, my mom and I do it together. Keeping this tradition alive helps me feel so much closer to my dad. We look at all of the ornaments we made together and look through old photos from past Christmases. My dad was also a huge football fan. We used to watch the Thanksgiving Day game together. I now always turn on the game as I am cooking for my family and I can almost hear him sitting on the couch cheering at the TV. These things may seem so small, but they now bring me so much joy. 

Honor The One That You Lost

Remembering the person you lost is so important. I know a lot of times I can suppress those emotions especially through the holidays because it can hurt so much. Taking a day or a few hours to honor the one you lost and let those emotions out can be very comforting. One way I like to honor my dad’s memory is that I leave an ornament on the mantle for him. He always used to put the last ornament on the tree so I leave the last one out for him. 

Spend Time With Your Family And Friends

Being around your loved ones can be extremely comforting. It’s nice if you can share memories of the one that you lost together but if you’re not able to do that just being around people can help bring happiness. I always love to watch Christmas movies with friends or bake with my family. It offers a great distraction and brings some joy in a hard time. 

Take Time For Yourself

This is the most important advice I can offer anyone. One of my favorite quotes is “It is okay, not to be okay” (UK). I think that it’s so important to remember that there will be days when it is too much and the grief is too hard, and that is completely okay. Not everyday is meant to be good, but remember that you are not alone. If you are having a bad day, take some time for you, buy some fuzzy socks or eat a pint of ice cream, and then try again the next day.

• christmas
• grief
• holidays
• mental health
• thanksgiving