UNH’s Do’s and Don’ts

Those apart of the UNH community know very well that most of us here on campus are pretty much down for anything in a judgement free zone. However, there ARE a few unspoken “rules” that should be followed in order to avoid total social suicide. Among these rules are also a list of suggestions in order to make sure that 35,000+ tuition worth it, thanks P-Hudd. You need to pay those loans back somehow, right? One can refer to these suggestions as UNH Do’s and UNH Donts. Allow me to elaborate:

 

1. Do get a JB! I didn’t get one until second semester of my Junior year and I definitely missed out on 5 semesters of tasty goodness. Perfect cure for a hangover and you can even place your order in advance (Franz’s knows hungover kids don’t like to wait). What’s not to love about egg, cheese, hash browns, bacon, hot sauce, and ketchup?

2. Do take a mental health day if it’s over 70 degrees. Papers, exams, group projects-they can all wait. We only get one good month of really nice weather here so we got to soak it up as much as we can! Whether you go to Hampton, lay on T-Hall lawn, or go to the pool anything is better than class!!

3. Do take the ever so cliché picture with the Wildcat outside the Whit. I don’t care if you are a first semester freshman or a second semester senior, this is a must! You can’t consider yourself a true UNHer without this picture, so roll up your sleeves, climb up, and ride that cat with pride!

4. Do study abroad! Seriously. As much fun as UNH is, traveling the world is 10x better. The experiences you’ll have will change you for the better. This is one opportunity you cannot let pass you by.

5. Do wait in line for a Philly omelet. I know what you’re thinking, “I’m hungover as shit and don‘t feel like standing in this line right now. So many freshman. OMG I’m gonna throw up.” But no. You stay in that line with pride knowing that all this hurt will all be worth it in the end, trust me.

6. Do join Greek life! Okay, I am bias on this one, but at least consider it. Greek life is a great way to make this campus feel smaller especially when you first get here. There are endless opportunities for community service work, leadership roles, and some good ol’ reckless fun. It’s definitely one of my better decisions and could be one of yours, too!

7. Do wipe down your machine at the gym. Let me repeat, do wipe down your sweat-filled, used treadmill, elliptical, etc. once your done. Nobody wants to get all up in your bodily excretions, and that is a fact.

8. Do walk of shame (lol). You have to experience this at least once and just laugh at yourself. There’s nothing quite like walking in your heels from the night before at 7 am when you’re still drunk. For best results, do this on Halloween weekend and wear your costume back while walking by a tour group. Parents might be mortified but every kid in that group will immediately want to come here all because you’re unprecedented bravery, and  for that we thank you. If nothing else, do it for the ratchets. 

9. Do get coffee on Main street. On one of these super nice days coming up, take the time to head down Main street and go to Breaking New Grounds with friends! It’s relaxing and fun at the same time, giving you a nice break from the stresses of the week. If you don’t like coffee, get a green tea or a lemonade! Just remember your Ray-bans. 

10. Do get a Freddy special from CampCo. Yum yum yum. One of the best treats you can get after the bar at 1 am: chicken tenders covered in buffalo and sweet and sour sauce. Speaks for itself.

11. Do get scorpion bowls at Mei Wei! You know it’s gonna be a good night when you start off at Mei Wei with your friends. Double scorpion bowls equal endless fun and high loss of memory which mixes to create a wild time.

12. Do go to a cocktail. Cocktails were created so that college boys and girls can dress to the nines only to end the night looking nothing like the way they started. Drinking and dancing the night away is outrageous fun and wearing formal attire just exaggerates the ridiculousness. Ya gotta go! And beware, there’s actually nothing formal about it. 

13. Do stop caring about what everyone thinks. You will never please everyone and trying to will not only ruin your time but will mentally exhaust the hell out of you. The sooner you stop caring, the happier you’ll be. 

14. Do go to Hair Excitement over Perfect Tan. Just an all around better atmosphere. Pretty sure there are better deals, too. 

15. Do start drinking at 8 am for homecoming. Everyone loves a little kegs and eggs. The earlier the better!

16. Do day drink on young drive! I don’t care if you wake up with the most treacherous hangover of your life and think that you can never see alcohol again, especially in the sun. These will be some of the best times. Strap on your big girl pants and get out there!

 

1. Don’t accidentally wind up on barstool. You know this could happen if some guy says “dump ‘em out!” and then you decide it’s actually a good idea to listen. Or if you just blackout and pass out with your shoes on. Rookie mistake. All someone has to do is take  picture and wam-bam you’re toast. Sorry, ma! 

2. Don’t wear heels out if you can’t walk in them. Girl, we’re watching you…

3.. Don’t get arrested. Everyone knows UNH cops just might be some of the most annoying people on campus. They live to arrest stupid drunk kids just like me and you who are just trying to have a good time! We all like to drink and get a little rowdy, just be smart about it. Internal possession is a silent killer. 

4.. Don’t schedule a Friday class. I understand that some people don’t really have a choice, but I managed to only have one Friday class so far in my college career and it has been awesome. Public service announcement: the drinking starts on Thursday, get hip. 

5.. Don’t study in the new Paul school unless you’re a business student. Just kidding! I do this all the time. It’s so fun.

6.Don’t be a frat wall make out! It’s very easy to get cornered in the dark depths of a just barely health and safety approved basement by a sweaty, drunk frat boy. But stand your ground, girl! Just because your eyes are closed doesn’t mean everyone else’s are, keep that in mind…

7. Don’t get super pretty for the gym! Come on girls, you’re going to a facility to sweat your bum off and drop those lb’s, not for a fashion show! Having pounds of make-up on your face and not wanting to ruin your hair doesn’t make you look hot, it makes you look like you’re in the wrong place and should exit immediately. 

8. Don’t get a reputation. This is mostly important for freshman girls but also upper classes, too. People will never forget their first impression of you and once you get a label stuck to you it might be there for the rest of your college career. It may seem as though UNH is a large campus but it gets real small once you become tagged as a “slut” or a “whore.” Don’t put yourself in that position.

9. Don’t take advantage of living in Williamson or Christiansen. Believe me when I say that freshman year will be one of the best years of your college career. Although it’s super far and having an RA is less than par, you find your best friends in these dorms and get to experience all your stupid first year decisions together. Looking back on these decisions will never fail to make you laugh until you cry and then cry some more because you’re almost a senior and you don’t know where the time went. Not to mention you walk by Kurt’s Lunch Box on the way home. They don’t call it the Freshman 15 for nothing!

10. Don’t mess with the UNH crossing guards. I’m telling you, these guys mean business. If you cross one second too soon they’ll make sure to embarrass you in front of the whole campus. It’s their world, we’re all just living in it. 

11. Don’t get an STD. That shit stays with you. Please just don’t. 

10. Don’t eat alone in the dining halls at dinner. Everyone knows that this is only acceptable at breakfast or lunch. That’s that.

12. Don’t go to the dining hall on themed nights. Unless you’re looking forward to waiting in lines upon lines and bumping into everyone and their mother. And I don’t mean seeing people, I actually physically mean running into them because there’s no walking room. Not fun.

13. Lastly on dining hall etiquette, don’t carry a tray of food. Unless you’re a football player who needs to eat over 1500 calories a day a tray is completely unnecessary and weird. 

14. Don’t go home too much. I know everyone misses their mom and dad and puppy but these four years go by way too quickly to go home every other weekend. If you stick to Thanksgiving, winter break, spring break, and occasionally Easter then you should be good to go.

15. Don’t always be in a relationship. College is where you find your bridesmaids, not necessarily your husband. Try to do your own thing, at least for a little while, and take a second to experience this ride on your own.