Spring is slowly upon us. The days are starting to lengthen, the last of the winter chill fading away, as the summer sun teases its return. According to Greek mythology, Persephone is returning to the mortal realm, giving some parting words to her husband, Hades, who is ever so reluctant to see her go. Yet, as king of the Underworld, he is shackled to his throne, serving as the caretaker of souls, and preventing them from returning to the land of the living. Poor Hades, having to see his beloved wife leave him every spring, all alone in the Underworld.
Most of us are familiar with the myth of Persephone and Hades. Persephone, the young daughter of Demeter, the goddess of agriculture, was prancing happily in a field, picking flowers. Hades, the lord of the Underworld, bursts from a crack in the earth in his chariot, and snatches the girl, spiriting her away into his domain. Demeter’s heart splits in half, and she searches until the ends of the earth for her daughter, leaving the lands barren and dead. Zeus, the king of the gods, seeing the disaster, attempts to negotiate with Hades for Persephone’s return, after Demeter continues to ravage the earth. Hades agreed, but tricked her into eating pomegranate seeds, binding her to return each year. Her reunion with her mother marks the beginning of spring, and her departure, the start of winter.
The violence in this love story is not romantic.
Source: Pinterest
Pop culture boasts a variety of retellings, from written works, to video games, to comic books — and, in general, the relationship between Hades and Persephone is painted in an intensely romantic light. The brooding man, pining desperately over the cheery and extroverted woman, willing to do anything to win her affections. The sun and the moon, winter and spring; modernity adores its opposites, even more so when it comes to romance. The imagery that arises from the myth is equally striking, and considering how the story of Hades and Persephone seems to be particularly tame in comparison to other Greek myths, it’s easy to see how many could have latched on to the story, sanitized to appeal to modern audiences. Feminist retellings have grown in popularity, granting Persephone more autonomy, framing it as her decision to stay with Hades. They paint her as an icon, embracing her sexuality and power by means of her relationship with the King of the Underworld. Aside from the multiple issues that arise from trying to shoehorn modern values into thousand-year-old stories, a key character remains noticeably absent from discussions. What of Demeter, her mother?
Demeter, goddess of the harvest, is a crucial character in the myth. She rages when she discovers her daughter has been stolen, and she causes a drought on the lands, nearly killing every mortal in the process. She fights Zeus, and manages to steal her daughter back — if only for half a year. Yet, Demeter is often vilified in modern retellings. She is an obstacle, a stumbling rock; an overbearing and controlling mother, infantilizing her daughter by “forcing” her to come back home. She has become a symbol of purity culture, and Hades, by contrast, is the hero offering Persephone the sexual liberation she so desires. Demeter’s grief is reduced to a tantrum, immature and deserving of scorn. She is effectively distorted into the archetype of the bitter, meddling mother-in-law, leaving readers with little sympathy towards her in comparison to the brooding, misunderstood hero. Ironically, in Homer’s “Hymn to Demeter,” one of the main sources of Persephone’s tale, Demeter’s grief takes center stage. It isn’t a love story — it’s a tragedy. The tale describes how the loss aged her, how she became practically unrecognizable to those around her. She abstains from food or drink, wasting away. She shuns the whole world, staying in her temple — much as a grieving mother does.
The world cares little for a mother’s sadness.
Source: Osama Shukir Muhammed Amin
Death steals mothers’ children. A child who loses their parents is called an orphan, a spouse who loses their partner, a widow. There is no word for a parent, a mother, who outlives their child. “Hymn to Demeter” was exposing this terrible reality. But that was not the only kind of loss that the story recounts. Mothers used to lose their daughters to marriage. There is also grief there, in knowing that the fate of your child rests in a stranger’s hands. In a time where women were considered little more than objects, to showcase a mother’s rage in that way was transformative. In any case, it feels backwards to try and twist a story that was meant to display the lengths a mother is willing to go for her daughter into some sort of romantic tale. A woman is either a maiden, a mother, or a crone, and the only acceptable type of mother is the gentle caretaker. Is this really the type of message that “modern” retellings of the myth want to transmit? We have repackaged misogyny, and slapped it with a “girl power” label to make it more palatable.
This isn’t the story of Persephone and Hades. This is the story between a mother and her daughter, Demeter and Persephone. It’s a tale with a bitter ending — Demeter has lost Persephone, even if she can still visit her. In ancient Greece, there was a festival known as Thermosphoria, a celebration of Persephone’s return from the Underworld. It was only for women, and it honored Demeter’s grief. When did we lose the true essence of the myth? Instead of relieving Hades of his wrongdoings, why not highlight the sheer courage and tenacity already exposed in the original myth? A mother and a daughter, having to be clever and fierce against all odds to see each other again.
Spring is slowly upon us. The days are starting to lengthen, and a child will be in her mother’s arms once more.