Although I had tried my hand at writing songs before, I wouldn’t consider that I properly started to do it until I was 11. At the time, I was also trying to learn to play the piano on my own. I remember walking after school to my parents’ workplace, excited to use the keyboard my dad had in his office. It was during these after school sessions that I managed to learn some basic music theory, which resulted in me picking up the guitar again. It was a very exciting period of my life! After jotting down in a tiny notebook what would turn out to be a very angsty song for an 11 year old, I felt like I had discovered a superpower. Although a bit out of practice, I immediately sensed that I had found something that was completely mine; and that felt very special.
Cut to almost 10 years later, after starting and abandoning many other hobbies and pursuits, the one thing that has remained consistent in my life is that I still write songs. The reason for that probably being that, somewhere along the journey, songwriting became more than a hobby to me; it became compulsory, like eating and breathing. You see, from the very moment I started, it was a way to make sense of my life. When I’m really sad, I write songs. When I’m really happy, I write songs. Whenever I’m feeling lost or confused in life, taking my guitar and letting out whatever was so foggy inside of me gives me a sense of purpose, if only for a moment.
Growing up, my life was very much intertwined with music. A great part of why I even started was because my dad and siblings were musicians. As a kid, I definitely absorbed their passion and, as any younger sibling does, wanted more than anything to be a part of it. A lot of our conversations revolved around music. My favorite memories with my dad include us blasting songs in his car because, unlike my mom, he understood my need for the stereo to be as loud as possible; to be engulfed in sound. This being said, it’s no surprise that music not only is the time marker of my life, but the axle which it revolves around.
So, when I try to explain the importance that writing songs has in my life, it’s hard to do it without it falling short. It would seem the only way I can justify it is that it is a part of my identity. If anyone asks me who I am or what I like doing, songwriting will always be my immediate answer. I think it’s a reaction to the very human feeling of wanting the things you do to feel like they matter in the long run. Putting words on paper, using my life to make something that has the ability to come to life on its own, it makes me feel like life is worthwhile.