Here’s to the girls that are feeling a little down over heartbreak or heartache. The first thing to remember is that it happens to everyone and it certainly happens for a reason. Being in love is an amazing expereince. You find someone to share wonderful experiences with, someone to comfort you, and someone to provide you with endless amounts of joy. And you think to yourself, “How could this ever end?” Things change, feelings change, and when it’s all over your world feels a little empty and your heart is a little heavy. You’re left standing in the midst of memories and emotions you don’t know how to handle. I’m here to tell you that it’s okay to be sad, it’s okay to feel hurt. I promise. The process of moving on is difficult, but definitely self-fulfilling.
You probably clicked on this article because you’re hurt. In fact, you might even feel fed up with the feelings you still have. That’s totally normal. Although I’m no expert, I’ve experienced moving on and have been through the ups and downs.
Letting go of someone who meant the world to you, who altered the person you are, who held a huge space in your heart is difficult – there’s no more of them and it sucks. Letting that person go however, is possible. Time to start smiling, getting back in life’s game, focusing on you and enjoying the suspense of what comes next. Time to move on.
Every corner of town reminds you of them, every movie is somehow symbolic of your break up and every song lyric hits you in the feels. Keep going until that stops.
Take as much time as you want.
You hear this all the time: “Time heals all pain,” but it’s true. Some pains take more time than others, and that’s ok. Believe and trust in the process of time. Yes, it depends on your situation and how the break up happened, but it gives you the opportunity to realize, forgive, and forget. The most important thing to remember is that it will get easier.
Distract Yourself
Please don’t torture yourself by sitting in your bed listening to sad music and wallowing in your depression. There’s a whole world out there waiting for you to make the most of it. By all means, feel how to want to feel, but don’t take a beautiful day for granted. Avoid thinking about all those past memories. Dive into your own recovery and open your eyes to new, fun, and opportunity. Do the things you love doing. Find the joy and comfort within yourself again. Go blast music, take a beach drive, treat yourself to Chipotle or sushi, hit the gym (show them what they are missing out on) and hang out with friends.
Cut them out.
Avoid checking their social media, looking at old pictures and keeping around their old sweatshirts you wore on the daily. Once you stop looking back, you know you’re doing better. Even when they call or text you at the worst times, remember what is best for you and that its over. Time passes and you don’t get it back. Although you were head over heels in love with this person, the gates of communication shouldn’t be left open until you can handle it. FACT: When you let them in, you open yourself up to terrible head games. This is your time to find yourself again, not to let them back into your life.
Face the facts: Why is it over?
I know it’s the ugliest of all truths. As time passes our minds wander down a nostalgic path. We think about a time of contagious passion and love – something very tempting and dangerous as your goal is to let that individual go and allow yourself to move on. Love will always exist in your mind, but you can learn to have better control over it. Realize what’s done is done. Have faith in yourself and pair this individual with enough negative feelings to ease yourself away.
Never give up on love.
Don’t hate love, hate the person that made you almost give up on love. I understand you thought your last love was probably the love of your life, but when you meet the real love of your life, your last relationship will become just another person who you used to share a special connection with. A new kind of love drowns the last. You never know who is around the corner willing to give you the time of your life. That last person may not have been right for you, but there’s more love to come.
At the end of the day, regret nothing. Time that was spent with the wrong person leads you to right things. Realize you deserve better. It’s better to have nobody than to have somebody around whose not all in. Never hold on to somebody that doesn’t deserve your unique and special qualities. Hey, you know what they say: The right person will come when you’re not looking. Move on, my friend. There’s other fish in the sea to catch.