I recently read the book Fast Girl: A Life Spent Running from Madness by Suzy Favor Hamilton and Sarah Tomlinson. The book discusses raw topics including mental illness, suicide, eating disorders and prostitution.
For those who don’t know, Favor Hamilton is a three-time Olympic runner and a public speaker. At one point, she was living a double life as a highly sought-after call girl in Las Vegas. She was diagnosed with bipolar disorder after her double life was exposed to the world. Through Fast Girl, Favor Hamilton could not only share her side of the story, but also shed a light on the disastrous effects that untreated mental illness can have on the sufferer and their family.
Here are three things I think we can all learn from Fast Girl:
1. Talk through your problems
A major issue throughout the book was the lack of communication between Favor Hamilton and her family members, coaches and friends. Her brother was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when she was still young, and her family coped by ignoring the issue. Many of us like to pretend that bad things aren’t happening to us, but when we stay quiet about them, nothing changes. We wind up feeling trapped and falling deeper and deeper into whatever situation is hurting us. The first step out of any negative situation is talking about it. Whether you choose to talk to a friend, a neighbor, a family member or a professional, the important thing is that you speak up about what you’re going through.
2. Don’t judge others
Another important point that the book made was the need for the feeling of safety in discussing problems. There’s a lot of stigma surrounding mental illness, and that stigma has only recently begun to break down. No matter what, if someone speaks to you about having a problem, be open and don’t judge. It took a lot of courage for them to open up to you about what’s going on in their life. The last thing they need is for you to make them feel bad, weird or even worthless. If someone comes to you, be open and just listen. Be compassionate. Let them know you are someone they can trust.
Also, for those suffering, don’t judge yourself. It can be hard not to feel like there’s something wrong with you because of what you’re feeling or doing. There’s not. You’re not your illness, and you can speak up without shame.
3. Seek help
Things can only get better with help. And, if you think that someone you love is suffering, encourage them to seek help. Mental illness isn’t a joke. It’s a real ailment, just like the flu or a broken bone. It causes real pain. You may not be able to see the hurt, but that doesn’t make it any less valid.
(Photos by Kaitlin Anderson)