To All the People Who Told Me I Wouldn’t Make It,
Thank you. Whether you verbally told me I wasn’t good enough or expressed it through your actions towards me, I truly appreciate it. Because of all your criticisms and hopes that I’d fail, I’ve achieved all I’ve wanted and more. Everyone has heard the phrase, “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” And as annoying as it can be to get that as advice when you are going through a hard time, it can be true if you let it.
It can be hard to get rid of people in your life, even the ones who negatively impact you. But the feeling afterwards is relieving and free. The toxic people I’ve had in my life have shown me part of self-care is surrounding yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself. We mold ourselves to fit our surroundings, and if we stay in a place and with people who are pessimistic and toxic our result is going to be reflective of our environment.
To the toxic people I’ve had in my life, you’re closed chapters now. You made my drive harder and my soul stronger. I’ve moved past you and now surround myself with people who want to see me succeed because they love and care for me, not because it will benefit them in some way. Instead of searching for the approval and praise of others I learned to be my own cheerleader and know the only voice I need to follow is my own.
After being pushed around I finally learned how to stand up and fight back. I had to get left to know how to find myself and be okay with being alone. Now I can depend on myself instead of needing the crutch of someone else who could take advantage of any dependence on them. I found strengths in my weaknesses and know better than I did before. You really don’t know until you know. Because of you I can help others and help them avoid the mistakes I made.
So, to the school counselor who told me my dreams were too big and I wouldn’t be able to handle everything I wanted to be involved in, I’m handling life just fine and am striving towards the future you were supposed to help me plan. To the people who tried to break my spirit – I am bolder and as fearless as ever. To the people who beat me down emotionally when you were supposed to be the ones to support me the most, now I know what real family is and know exactly how NOT to treat the people I love and care about. To the people who broke my heart after I gave you my all, now I know what to look for in a partner and have experienced what selfless love is, not conditional and manipulative “love.”
And to the people who wronged me and thought I wouldn’t do anything about it, my voice is fierce and loud, and you cannot silence it anymore. I could have let you tear me down but instead I used the bricks thrown at me to build a strong foundation to rise from. Experiencing the bad made it easier to me to see and appreciate the good so much more.
Just remember, the bigger the rainstorm, the bigger the rainbow is afterwards.