Mommy roomie? Been there. Dorm fails? Done that. Third Wheel? You bet. And now, here we are at Part IV! I must say, I’ve come a long way these past three years since I’ve been a high school grad. Yet, I still don’t have everything figured out. Again, I have some woes to elaborate and advice to give.
So the story goes, “I found the perfect and most adorable house!” Why don’t I ever put the house’s awesomeness second to the roommate’s cleanliness, moods, habits, lifestyles, etc.? You’d think I’d have learned by now. Guess not. So yes, the house I live in now is darling, convenient, and all those other good things. Now let’s get to the good…or bad (however you want to look at it) part!
My new roommate is the polar opposite of the women I lived with previously. While they were quiet, conservative, and religious – she is rambunctious, wild, and free-spirited. She is a true hippie with flowers in her hair, Mary J in her hand, and no shoes on – ever.
I experienced a minor culture shock in the first few days of my move, but her “love everyone” attitude really made me feel welcome in the house. If you read my last article, you’ll know that “welcome” was a feeling I hadn’t experienced in a while. Though we are not at all twins, my roommate and I share a few interests. Our roommate/friendship relationship was in good shape and I was feeling good about my decision. Then she went out of town, and I discovered the catch to my new place.
Her friends.
[Quick piece of background information: At this time, I had been working at the airport, and my new shift was from 4:30-9:30. Oh not bad? Yeah, that’s military time. So, I was getting up for work at 3:00 a.m.]
It was a Tuesday night, the first night I’d spent in the house completely by myself. I was nervous as I’m pretty sure every horror movie begins this way! I was absolutely terrified when I heard someone upstairs at 11:30 p.m. Paralyzed, I didn’t know what I should do next. Call the police? Hide? Sneak out through the garage? While I was contemplating how I was going to save my own life, I heard more voices upstairs – laughing. Then one voice sounded familiar. Weird.
I went upstairs and found three skinny, long-haired boys, with beers in hand, munching on my left over pizza. “Who the hell are you guys and what are you doing in my house?” Shocked, the boys turned to face me. “We’re your roommate’s friends. She said we could crash here since the rain is so bad and we don’t have cars. I have her spare key.” After reading over textual proof and still finding the situation rather irritating and strange, I acknowledged that they were guests of my roommate. I asked them to please be quiet (I hate that I had to do that. I’m turning into my mother! But I had to work in four hours, and I hadn’t slept…I’m not a fun-hater!) and then I went back to my room.
For the next three hours, on the hour, I was woken out of an almost-asleep state. Three times I had to leave my room and tell the increasingly large amount of strangers in my house to stop: running around, eating my food, playing in the shower, having sex in my roommate’s bed, spilling drinks, and blasting music and singing at the top of their lungs. It was aTuesday night, it wasn’t their house, and they knew I had to work in the morning! Yet none of those factors led them to reconsider raging at my house.
When I finally decided I’d had enough, I texted my roommate. She apologized like crazy. Claiming that only two (I counted about fifteen) people were told they could stay the night. She told me she texted them and told them to “Shut it down.” It didn’t matter though, I had to leave for work anyway. So, she told them they had to leave and their excuse, as pathetic as it was, “We’re all sleeping and chilling, let us stay!” They convinced my roommate, and so they stayed. I was livid. Oh! It’s 4:00 a.m. and you’re all tired? Just now “chilling” are you?” Wow! Wouldn’t that be nice?!
Furious, I had to leave my house with all those people still inside. When my roommate returned from her vacation, I made it very clear that would not happen again. It hasn’t – at least not on that scale. Mishaps happen frequently, but my roommate has made efforts, and her and I can at least carry a dialogue. We have another girl moving in soon. She seems wonderful and I’m praying I’m not wrong about this one…
Collegiettes™, here is my final advice: roommates will always, in one way or another, at one time or another, suck. The best thing you can do for yourself is stay positive. Know what you’re getting into, and if you decide to commit – try your best to make it work. My dad has literally refused to help me move if I move within the next year again. Don’t put stress on yourself or your dad, investigate before signing!
Even though roommates are difficult, they will also be the people who teach you about respect, friendship, sharing, and boundaries. Just know you are never alone in roommate woes!
Wishing you good luck and self-control in all of your current and future living situations!
From: One, finally content, Salt Lake City resident.
HCXO! Shykell