So, I was sitting in therapy last week, and I was talking about how stressed I was (which is… pretty normal. College is hard you guys). That was when my therapist asked me a question that basically went like this:
“What are you doing to maintain your work-life balance?”
Well… That’s a great question, I suppose. It’s really important to have a balance of work and play in your life to prevent burnout. But I’m doing fine! I don’t feel like I’m unable to get out of bed, or like there’s so much going on in my life that I can’t keep up — just that it’s a little hard to stay on the ball. So, I thought about what my work-life balance is. The response I came up with was:
“Uhhhh… I have some… extracurriculars that I do.”
Yeah, at that point it was pretty much over for me. The jig was up. She knew that I wasn’t taking care of myself like I should be. I felt pretty called out! I’m proud of what I’m doing between school, work, and all the other stuff I’ve thrown on top of that to round out my life. Then it dawned on me. Why do I feel like I don’t deserve time to myself? What about working this hard makes it ok for me to neglect myself?
I realized I didn’t have any answers to these questions. I don’t know why I haven’t felt like making sure I have time blocked off to focus on myself is a good idea. I believe that a lot of us think that we can totally take on more than we can manage and avoid burnout. I know that I’m guilty of thinking that I’m above struggling with being overworked or overstressed. So, when my therapist followed it up by saying:
“Is there anything you can change to spend some time unwinding?”
It made me wonder — what could I do to unwind more? How do I take breaks during my hectic days? What can I work into my schedule so that I am not someone who’s struggling too much with being overworked, but instead I am someone who is able to deal with my responsibilities in a way that’s responsible to me, too.
I definitely don’t have all the answers, and quite honestly, I don’t know if anyone does. But having this conversation felt important to me, and I wanted to share my thought process with you. Hopefully, something calls you out and makes you re-examine what aspects of your life you can tweak to be kinder to yourself.
Note: If you or someone you know is struggling with mental illness, or even just feeling super stressed, it’s really important to seek help from a trained professional.