Growing up in Utah I have always been surrounded by the idea of “happily ever after”. You find a nice boy, fall in love, and then eventually get married. Ever since I was a little girl I have grown up on these stories. I always just expected that I would find a prince, marry him, and live happily ever after. Now in my early twenties, I don’t think that’s what I want. I still love happily ever afters, but only when they are in stories. It took me a while to come to terms with that. When I first started college I felt like I was running out of time. Since I go to college in Utah a lot of my peers are already engaged, if not married. I remember feeling left out. I haven’t been in a serious relationship in over a year, and if it wasn’t going to happen now when would it happen. But the truth is I didn’t know that it wasn’t what I needed. What I wanted was to find a prince that would kiss me, and then we would live happily ever after. I wanted someone else to solve all my problems, but more importantly, I wanted someone to make me happy.
After I realized that it took some time for me to accept that I couldn’t ever depend on someone else to make me happy; and that is where my problem with happily ever after comes from. It comes from the expectation that you need someone else to be happy. When in all honesty the only person that can make you happy is yourself. That’s why I think we should strive to change how we view happily ever after. Because if you are happy in the end does it matter how you got there? Because in the end “happily ever after” just means you are happy. Sometimes it might even take a while to find what makes you happy. I think that’s why we cling on to the happily ever afters in stories. Because they are easy, they are what the media tells us we should want, but in the end, they are just stories. Even if you do find the love of your life you don’t share one magical kiss and live happily ever after. You have to work at it, work at your relationship, and work at being happy. If having a happily ever after means you have work to have it, I think you should also have the option to chose what you want to put that effort in. Be it a relationship, birdwatching, finishing a novel, or doing anything else you might want to do. Because in the end it is your life, and your time, and you must do what is ever in your power to get your own happily ever after
