The Pressure of Perfection
For many of us, the “perfect” college experience is painted as four years of academic success, a busy social calendar, a well-rounded resume, and lifelong friendships. The best four years of your life they say. These expectations can feel overwhelming, especially when your actual experience doesn’t measure up to the ideal. However, the perfect college experience is just a myth. It’s important to recognize that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to college, and success should be defined by your personal goals, not by societal standards or social media highlights.
One of the most common pressures we face is the idea that we must do everything and do it well. Whether it’s maintaining a 4.0 GPA, joining multiple clubs, securing internships, or building a social network, it can feel like there’s no room for error. It feels like no matter how much we do or take on, there’s always something more to be doing. These expectations can make us feel burned out, anxious, and disappointed, as we tend to push ourselves to meet unattainable standards.
College is really a time for exploration, growth, and learning—not just academically, but personally. You’re bound to face challenges along the way, it’s how you handle those setbacks that shape your experience, not whether or not you meet a picture-perfect version of success.
Redefining Success and Happiness
Success in college doesn’t have to be defined this way. Instead, it should be about growth, learning, and finding joy in the process. Here are some ways you can redefine success and happiness for your own experience:
- Focus on Personal Growth: College is a time for personal development, a time where you learn so much about yourself. Success for someone can mean discovering new passions, learning from failure, or gaining skills that will help in life. Growth isn’t always linear, and setbacks are a natural part of the process.
- Set Your Own Goals: Success doesn’t have to mean graduating with honors or landing a six-figure job. It can be something as simple as making a meaningful connection, gaining new experiences, or working toward your own mental and physical well-being. Make sure to measure your success in ways that work for you, instead of trying to measure it within someone else’s standards that you feel pressured to meet.
- Prioritize Well-being: Happiness doesn’t come from perfection; it comes from balance. Taking care of your mental and physical health should always be a priority. The “perfect” experience should involve self-care, rest, and realistic expectations for what you can handle. You can’t do your best if you’re not feeling your best so it’s important to make sure you prioritize yourself.
- Embrace Imperfection: This may be hard for us to grasp, but college won’t always go according to plan. Embracing imperfection can help us enjoy the journey rather than constantly striving for an unattainable ideal. We may feel the need to be perfect but “perfectness” is so subjective that you can’t really be perfect in every way for everyone or everything.
Overall, breaking down the myth of the perfect college experience is about accepting that success and happiness are subjective. College is not a one-size-fits-all experience, and that’s what makes it special. Remind yourself of this, as sometimes we tend to forget when we get caught up in the feelings of the moment.