You meet. You hang out. Then you hang out more. Then comes the weekend, and you better be hanging out by the end of the night…. right? Defining relationship has been confusing enough, but nothing is as confusing as relationships at UVA.
Are they dating, are they hooking up, are they…exclusive? Sadly, no one ever really knows, but one thing makes it official beyond all gossip is the oh so loved “Facebook Relationship Status.” But, as someone who dreads publicly sharing my private life, I don’t think Facebook is the best way to determine what makes a UVA relationship official. So the question is…what is? Open communication from what I’ve seen is the best solution to all the confusion. As cheesy and Dr. Phil of me as it may sound, I’ve come to learn that the longer you wait to speak what is on your mind, the more room you’re creating for things to get messy. It’s hard to meet someone’s expectations when you don’t know what they are. And even worse, failure to voice what makes you upset will leave no fair warning for the other person to avoid doing what upsets you.
The fear of rejection is enough to make any girl quickly zip up her lips, but not saying
any thing will only make potential rejection in the future even harder. Believe me there is no point in avoiding the inevitable with silence, so just talk about what
your thinking and chances are the two of you will be on the same page.
So, what’s the point of all of this? Speak up! Make sure the person you secretly want to have a more defined relationship with knows what you’re thinking. The conversation may not go exactly as you plan, but at least it will get you talking. Knowing where each of you stands is the basis of a healthy relationship, and the next step will naturally be to define your expectations. How do you go about bringing up the conversation? Ask the person on an official date if you haven’t had one yet, and talk about it over dinner. The more mature
setting will encourage mature conversation. Avoid bringing up the conversation at times when you both may not be making the best and most rational decisions. A drunken
commitment can be just as bad as no commitment at all, so make sure for the right time to
bring up what’s on your mind. And once you do decide to make it official, if you are
anything like me, I can assure you, Facebook does not have to be in the official equation.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UVA chapter.