Feeling

During the procrastination stage of writing one of my final final papers, I found myself browsing the documents library of my laptop, with which I’ve had a roller coaster-like relationship since my senior year of high school. I stumbled upon an article I had written for my high school’s student newspaper in April of 2010, close to graduation time. It was about that “feeling” that you get when you find the perfect college for you, which makes that final acceptance decision easier. I wrote about  how I had applied to six schools that I seemingly loved equally and wanted to go to each of them…or so I thought until the day that acceptance letters released for UVa. The article describes that day—March 26, 2010—and it’s obvious that I was a nervous wreck. Later, I had a moment of self-reflection which make up the closing lines of the article:

“I got home that evening and sat at my computer, ready to view my decision letter, but before logging in, I realized something. This was the “feeling.” The continuous worrying, freaking out when anything orange and blue came into sight, not being able to focus on anything; this was the feeling that made me realize how badly I wanted to be accepted into the University of Virginia. I wanted it more than I had thought. 

Thankfully, I did receive an acceptance letter, which sparked an hour of jumping up and down and yelling, “Wahoowa!” with my parents. The search for my perfect college and for the “feeling” was over. That “feeling” may be different for everyone, but everyone has it. You’ll know it when you feel it.”

As a fourth year looking ahead into the future, I can’t say that there is a collective “feeling” of combined apprehension, affirmation, and relief similar to the one just described that unites us all as a class. Some of us are staying at the University for another semester or year; some are moving on to continue their studies at another graduate school; some are entering the “real world” of full-time employment; and then there are some who still do not know what lies ahead post-graduation. Each of these scenarios comes with different sets of emotions attached to them: excitement, disappointment, anxiety, fear, happiness, hope, etc.

While these emotions felt by each individual of U.Va.’s class of 2014 about entering life after U.Va. may span across a broad range, I am almost certain that the Class of 2014 shares the same indescribably bittersweet feeling about leaving U.Va. Even though we are all going separate ways, we are still united by that feeling, and the fact that we are a member of the University of Virginia’s one and only class of 2014. At least for me, that feeling will always cheer my heart and warm my blood. Wahoowa. 

• feeling
• getting older
• graduation