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A Single Girl’s Guide to Surviving the Holidays

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UVA chapter.

They could be the best of times, they could be the worst of times…it’s official, as of last week, winter is upon us, and just in time for the 2014-15 holiday season. As much as I fantasize about the balmy sixties and seventies hanging around all year, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years just wouldn’t feel the same to me if I couldn’t see my breath in the air and feel the cold quicken my step. Born and raised in New England, I mouth a silent prayer to the gods of weather whenever blessed with a warm-ish day down here in Virginia as autumn slows and cools towards winter, but I know all is as it should be. (Sidebar: These weather patterns are crazier than I’d like to think because it is shockingly in the fifties at my house in Massachussetts while down here in “the South” we freeze our butts off in unusually cold temps for the season. What’s up with climate change and global warming, yo? But that’s a topic for another time.)  

Anyway, THE HOLIDAYS! If you claim to not look forward to Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, or whatever holiday it is you celebrate in this whereabouts of the calendar year, I’m going to have to call your bluff. Who cares what it is about this time that attracts you: for some it’s the cooler weather, for others it’s a chance to be with loved ones. Whether it’s the beauty of snowy winter nights or a cozily decorated home, or the chance to spend time back in the comfort of your own hometown with friends, family, or a significant other, most of us look forward to and cherish the next two months. At least I know I do. 

I also know that in the coming weeks and months some people will face great difficulty, mental, emotional, and maybe even physical. Maybe you’ve suffered a loss in the family, maybe you’ve got seasonal affect disorder (SAD, a real, ironic condition), maybe you’re stressed with finals and the end of the term, maybe everything is more or less “fine” but you don’t have a boyfriend, you’re lonely, and you’re watching all the other happy people having dandy splendid times holding hands and smooching in the street; regardless of the reason, as Jessie J once said, “it’s okay not to be okay.” 

It can be hard to be sad over the holidays, and being single can definitely contribute to that wintery melancholy. I’ve compiled a list of activities, ideas, and tips for those of us braving the season solo, going stag to those holiday parties, and feeling generally alone. Just because you don’t have someone to introduce to your family at thanksgiving or to kiss under the mistletoe, it doesn’t mean there’s nothing fun, rewarding, uplifting, and worthwhile to do this time of year. 

Whether you’re down in the dumps or you’re just looking for some new things to do in your free time, check out this list of suggested activities and tips to not feel so alone this holiday season.

  • Get a pet! Or if you’re not up for that level of commitment, spend some quality time with some animals that don’t have homes and go hang out at the local SPCA. Animals deserve love on the holidays too, don’t they? Plus, it’s impossible not to smile when you’re playing with puppies and kittens.
  • Have sweets on hand. Treat yo self. Indulge in chocolates, cookies, candies, whatever floats your sugary boat. A sweet bite (or 10) every day won’t do you any harm. Plus, winter (and thanksgiving) is coming, best start preparing for hibernation and eating everything in sight.
  • Volunteer at a soup kitchen or some kind of organization to help the less fortunate. Volunteering at a soup kitchen is especially great if you’re feeling lonely. You get to make friends with other caring people who volunteer with you, and you get to see and touch the people in whose lives you’re making a difference.
  • Remember that old friend of yours who you were really close with and alwayshad fun with, but as time passed your lives just took you in different directions and you lost touch? Take the time to pick up the phone and call him or her. Even if your paths won’t ever cross again, it’s good to reach out to people who you care about, even if you know you won’t see them. And who knows, it could even lead you to reconnect!
  • Think back to when you were a little kid and your parents would take you to the toy store so you could pick out a present. Who says that’s only for little kids? Give your inner five-year-old a gift and look around a toy store. Take a friend with you! Check out Shenanigans Toy Store, 601 W. Main between the corner and down town.
  • Watch Love Actually because that movie is the key to happiness. If you have never seen it, consider this activity mandatory. 
  • Set up a secret santa with your friend group. Choose a low price range, like $10 maximum, so it doesn’t end up being too much of a money sucker. For those of you of legal drinking age, airplane bottles from the ABC store make a great, affordable gift! There are probably some pretty inexpensive little toys in Shenanigans as well.
  • Head downtown and go ice skating at the main street arena. Who cares if it’s only your best friend’s hand that you’re holding? Never underestimate the power of holding someone’s hand while ice skating.
  • Have you ever had someone in one of your classes randomly decide to bring snacks for the class? No? Maybe you should become that person. Bake a batch of cookies or buy a bag of candy or chips and share them with your favorite class on the last day before Thanksgiving break. Think of all the smiles and maybe even new friends you’ll make.
  • Give the simplest and most gratifying gift of all–smile at someone on the street, especially if they look like they’re having a bad day. It can make a world of difference in someone’s life to receive a small, simple act of kindness from a stranger. A smile from a stranger has helped me on some of my worst days. It is always so touching to me when people take the time to look at and to really see one another.  Put some good karma out into the world and smile when you can, who knows when a stranger will come through for you, in ways big or small. 
Jenna Bernstein is an aspiring writer studying English at the University of Virginia. She is interested in film, television, philosophy, feminism, travel, and art. Oh, and sushi. Definitely sushi. 
Katrina Margolis graduated from the University of Virginia with a degree in English and Film. She served as the senior editor of HC UVA for two and a half years. She is currently an assistant editor for The Tab. Wahoowa!