Dorm life has proved to be difficult for Sophomore student Mara Anderson, as it’s been reported that her roommate Ashleigh is going through a breakup. The two girls met only weeks ago while moving in, and haven’t had more than a few conversations between classes. That is until recent events unfolded.
“Ashleigh swears that it was mutual, but given how many times I’ve seen her watch Ella Enchanted while crying and eating ice cream; I think she’s leaving some details out.”
Their neighbors confirmed the news, adding they are able to hear sounds from Ella Enchanted, Love Actually, and playlists of sad country songs through their shared wall. One neighbor, who chooses to remain anonymous remarked, “It would be one thing if she was listening to Lizzo, and putting herself out there, but this is becoming a lot.”
At this time, we cannot report whether Ashleigh will eventually get over the breakup, or if Mara will be able to switch rooms.
DISCLAIMER: Satire