Dear Younger Me,
Remember that time you were six and wore that tank top? And you didn’t like it because it showed a lot of skin and you had never worn something like that before. And then your grandma leaned down and said “It’s okay. You look sexy”. You thought about that for a long time afterwards. You didn’t want to be sexy.
Remember that time you were in sixth grade and your friend Josh gave your home number to this weird kid? He called every single night after school, multiple times. You had to keep the phone in your room because you didn’t want to worry your parents. It took him months to leave you alone, even after you had told him to stop.
Then there was that one time in eight grade, when guys slapped girls’ butts all the time. All the popular girls would just act playful and bashful when it happened to them. But, when a guy slapped your butt as you were getting off the bus, you didn’t feel playful. You felt ashamed and mad. You didn’t say they were allowed to touch you, but they thought they could.
And you watched countless numbers of inappropriate movie scenes and strange commercials that mom would change really quickly. The women on TV always looked beautiful, but that was about all they did. You were constantly reminded that being a girl was something you had to keep watch over and be careful with.
Then you got a little older, and now guys stare at you. They slap their friends and point at you like you’re an exhibit at the zoo. Your basketball coach, while telling everyone else what they’re exceptional at, stops at you and says “She’ll bring the guys in to watch us play.” As if that was all you were good for, to give males something to look at.
When you go to college, you meet tons of new people. It seems to be everything you hoped for. Then every single new guy you met drops off, just because you want a friend while they want something more. You can’t even go running by your apartment without someone cat calling you.
When you tell people your career aspirations, they say, “don’t you know the boys are just gonna flirt with you?” “You’re too pretty to teach high school.” Trying to re-connect with old friends from high school earns you a picture of their genitals, because for some reason they think that’s appropriate.
So to my younger self, wear that dress, and go run in that neighborhood. Walk through the hallways with your head held high. Don’t let anyone tell you what you should do with your life. Play sports with all your heart, and always speak your mind. Connect with people, and don’t be afraid to let them walk away from your life.
I just want you to know one thing. Being a female in a male-driven world is not going to change who you are, it’s just going to make you stronger.