How to Survive Long-Distance Relationships

Do you ever feel yourself drowning because some things are too much handle? Or because of things that are beyond anything you could ever control? Who is there to help you with your heartache when the one you lean on hurts you? What do you do then? What do you do when you feel like your whole world is falling apart? 

Just breathe and let it all out.

Whenever I get upset, angry or sad over something my loved one does, my heart goes wild and I start to panic. I panic over things that I can’t control. I panic because he doesn’t seem to understand what I’m trying to say. I panic because I fear he may want someone better. Better than me. Whenever I feel that way, I cry.  I hate when people always say that crying makes you weak or that you’re way too emotional. Not true. Crying doesn’t make you weak or emotional at all. Crying helps you release your stress. It gives you the ability to take some of the pressure you are feeling off your shoulders. 

Photo by MMPR on Unsplash

So, you know what? Don’t pay mind to what anyone has to say about crying. Just cry. Let it all out and cry. After you’ve finished crying, clear your mind and take a break. 

 Break. Not breakup. Take some time away from your loved one. Live your own life. You start to think, “How much space do we need to get from each other? We’re already 2,000 miles away.” It doesn’t matter if you’re near or far from each other. What matters is that you are living your life on your own without him. You can snap each other every now and then but don’t let your whole world revolve around him. Just because you see his snap doesn’t mean you have to answer him back right away. Do your own thing. Whatever you used to do on your free time, do that! You don’t have to be there all the time. I do not know how many times I have to stress about that. It is so important for you to do that. You must learn to not be dependent on others, especially a guy. 

You see, in my honest opinion, I was doing that. I wanted my life to be with my boyfriend, always. I would snap him whenever I got his snaps or messaged him back quickly if he texted me. I let that control my life. We made this schedule to Skype every night, as it was the very last thing for the day. Sometimes it was good and sometimes it was bad. I was getting so obsessed with that schedule that it was my life. Every night, before I would go to sleep, we would Skype. Whenever he was unavailable to Skype or when he didn’t want to, I would get angry and feel so lonely. I would feel ignored or unloved. But that wasn’t the case at all.

You get so obsessed with it that when he is unable to do that or doesn’t want to, it feels like your whole world is ending. You get upset. Your heart starts to hurt severely. You have no idea what to do. Your life feels like it’s falling apart because the person you love, the person with whom gives you the most comfort, is unable to be with you. Then you get lonely. You start to contemplate all these feelings of being unloved or unwanted. You may also get this feeling that he may want someone else. Let me tell you something. Those feelings are wrong. So wrong. Have faith and trust in him.

Photo by Almos Bechtold on Unsplash

Trust is one of the most important key factors in a relationship, especially for long distance couples. You must be able to trust one another if you want your relationship to succeed. Trust is all about being able to live separately without the fear of something or someone ruining what you have. This may not be the same with couples that are local, but it is already done for long distance couples. We already have to go through the whole separation situation before we get to be with one another locally.

Just because he can’t talk to you or Skype with you doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t want you. And that’s one of the things that I struggled with the most. I struggled with trusting my boyfriend. I always feared that he would rather prefer someone local over me. I always feared that. But now I don’t. We can trust in each other. We can be honest with one another. And we are loyal to one another.

Photo by Ryan Franco on Unsplash

Best advice: Trust in him and live your own life. This will make your life so much more better. I feel free and alive. I feel wonderful and loved. And I feel happier than I have ever felt in a long time. Yes, make time for each other but live your own life. Take this into consideration and I assure you, your relationship will be so much happier.

• long distance
• relationships