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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UWindsor chapter.

I don’t miss you. I used to wonder how I don’t miss someone who used to be such a huge part of my life. Is there something wrong with me? Am I heartless? I used to believe that there must be something wrong with me if I find it hard to miss you. You were essentially like a sister to me for a very long time. My very early realization of 2017 is that I shouldn’t question why I don’t miss you.

I don’t owe it to you to miss you. I’m not obligated to. And that’s okay.

When I look back on the good times we shared, I am a bit critical of them. Looking back, I don’t know how the old me was able to tolerate so much disrespect and hate from one person. I felt like I owed it to you to be loyal to you, because you held the title of being my best friend. Just because I had given you that title in my head, doesn’t mean I deserved to tolerate all that you put me through. But at that point of my life, I did have happiness in you. There were good times, and I will give you credit for them. You did do some good things for me. There were some great times that I will forever cherish. I will always look back on those moments and remember how they shaped me to be who I became today.

I value the good times, I appreciate them, but I do not miss them.

Just because there were good times, doesn’t void out the bad times. Because the bad times were really bad. There is no reason why I should have had to go through so much in such a short amount of time. I don’t understand why you didn’t see that I tried. I really did. I put my heart and soul into our friendship.

I did it because then, I did miss you. But now, I don’t.

I don’t because we grew apart. We both ventured onto different paths in life. We both grew older and have different points of view. It hurts to see how the things I did and was apart of never influenced you, but you have been interested in the things I was after I left your life. It hurts how you always thought I was against you. It hurts how you never listened to me, even when I spoke up to you. You just didn’t understand my point of view. You didn’t care about my feelings, and you didn’t want me in your life.

Because of that, I got tired. I got tired of fighting for something that would get me nowhere. I was pretty much begging you to stay in my life when you were already over me.

When that hit me, I lost my feelings for you.

I realized it was time for me to let go of you and move on with my life. I tried to do that smoothly, but you really didn’t let me. I didn’t want to end things without closure or on bad terms. You didn’t get me. I hope you do now. Because of this, my heart just hasn’t been able to handle anymore. I had missed you too many times and was tired of being yo-yo’ed around. My heart gave up.

Just because I don’t miss you, doesn’t mean I don’t wish you well. I’ve seen you a few times as you’ve tried to avoid me. I don’t understand why you came into my work now, when you never once did when we were friends. But you did. Even then, I was hurt, but didn’t miss you, and didn’t wish bad on you.

I do wish the best for you. I hope your dreams and aspirations come true. I hope you are a happier person without me. Because my life is a lot better without you, too. I hope you can look back on our friendship and appreciate the good times.

You were one of the greatest memories I’ll forever cherish, because you shaped who I am. Since standing up for myself, I’ve been so much stronger, so thank you for that.

I wouldn’t ever go back to our friendship because I don’t miss you, but I will forever remember our memories.

Thank you.

 

Taurus. Vegan. Tea lover. Rabbit enthusiast. Aspiring social worker and writer. The proud owner of many pets. Avid reader. Fan of the Office, the Simpsons, and Married...with Children. Judge Judy is my idol. The biggest Green Day fan you'll ever meet. I do also enjoy Muse and Mac DeMarco.
Bryanna Millben

Laurier Brantford '20

Hi! I'm a fourth-year at Wilfrid Laurier University working towards a BA in English with a minor in History, and the Campus Correspondent/President for HC Laurier Brantford. I have a super sweet golden retriever named Marley, and aspire to work in Public Relations.