Family Hurts Too

Can family members be abusive? It it normal for your loved ones to be so cruel? What do you do when you have faced abuse and it is in your immediate household?

At a young age, I always visited my friends house. For majority of her life, she bounced back and forth from her parents house to her grandmothers when they were busy. Her grandmother was a woman who was kind, loving, and made sure that her granddaughter had everything that she needed, or so they thought. One night, my friend called me crying, asking why she had to live the life that she did. She spoke of her grandmother slamming her head into their car trunk, pushing and shoving her whenever she said something the way her grandmother didn’t want her to say. She told me that when she explained to her father the horrible things her grandmother would do, she was brushed off, called a liar, and sent back to her grandmothers house. 

At that point, we understood that the people who are supposed to love you the most, actually don’t love you the way that love should be shown. 

The concept of love is something that some who experience domestic violence, whether it may be verbal, physical, or emotional don’t understand until it’s too late. 

My friend went back to her grandmothers home, however this time the abuse she faced left scars and emotional damage over the years. When she told her mother what was going on, her mom made sure to send a restraining order and make sure that her daughter never had to go to her grandmother’s house again. 

Some who experience domestic violence never have anyone to speak up for them and make sure they never have to go through their situation alone. Many have been afraid to speak of their trials and leave their oppressors, however people like my friend never gave up on trying to get out a a situation they knew was wrong. 

In the end, her grandmother died falling down the stairs. She had an aneurysm and then extra died in a house fire, which was a bit dramatic, but we laugh about it today. 

All in all, make sure that if you know someone or see signs of domestic violence, be there for that person and make sure that you listen and support them in their times of trying to decide to leave. Some need more convincing than others, but at the end of the day help any way you can, whether that may be getting the police involved with an anonymous tip or making a plan that will save a life. 

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