I like to believe that the universe gives us roles to play in our lifetime. A few examples include the drop dead gorgeous girl, the brainiac, the talented football star… you get the picture. These roles can either be temporary or lifelong either depending on the universe or how well you play the role. I’m convinced that the universe has given me the role of the heartbreakee. Yea, not heartbreaker– heartbreakee. Heartbreakee: the person who gets their heartbroken instead of the one breaking hearts. My role is so lame that the word heartbreakee is not even considered a real word in the dictionary. It sucks.
The worst part about this is that I don’t even know if it’s temporary or lifelong. There are times when I go back and forth thinking it’s either or . I mean, I’ve played the role of the heartbreakee pretty well before. I’ve gotten my heart ripped out my chest, been humiliated, played with, been used and have cried my eyes out. I’ve played that role so well that if I were to get my heart broken again, the feeling would be numb.
As of right now, I’ve been in a relationship for two years and everything is well. But I’m still a firm believer in the universe giving people roles to play. Is it bad that I’m just waiting on the day to get my heartbroken because I don’t know whether my role is temporary or lifelong? It’s really sad and stupid and I shouldn’t think this way but I do. I’ve played this role so well and so long that at this point I’m just looking for a sign from the universe to tell me if I’m done playing this role or do I have awhile to go?
-HCXO!