You’ve found your sweetie and it has been some time now. Everything has been going great especially since you each have your own place to relax after spending time together. Yet you don’t mind spending a couple days at his house, all the while leaving some items over. Whether it’s a toothbrush, a few pairs of undies, even some leggings and moisturizer— you practically have two places to call home! More time goes by and you sit your partner down to have a progressive talk. “What do you think about moving in together?”
Wow! Coming out guns blazing, aren’t we? No point in beating around the bush, it’s not like we don’t have “sleepovers” all the time. Why not cut down on gas money, save on rent and bills and grow together even more? Those all seem like an adult and economically responsible reasons to officially cozy up together right? Right?
How about we weigh the pros and cons of moving in with your significant other and you can make a decision for yourself? I would make it for you but I don’t have all the answers sis!
Pros
Saves On Gas and Rent
You could say moving in with your partner is like having another roommate. This time is someone you’ve chosen and actually, like. Driving from your place to theirs, from class and everywhere else you have to go can put a tax on your gas tank. And we all know cars don’t run on love! On top of that, you divide your time between their house and yours but you still pay rent and utilities every month. Moving in together means splitting rent and utilities so it is cheaper for the both of you. With all that money you both save we’re looking at fancier date nights and self-care sprees!
Getting To Kow Your Partner Better
There is only so much you can learn spending time with your partner a few hours a week. Living together is far more intimate than spending a few hours on the phone. Under the same roof, you can learn what they like don’t like, what quirks they have and most important if you two can really cohabitant or not. That is something many people learn later down the line when they feel it’s too late.
You’re In Love
As cliché as it may sound, you two are in love and ready to take the next step. Of course, the next step doesn’t include marriage and children but moving in together is a big step! You’ve been talking about the future and post college plans, things are falling together rather nicely. Why not make an adult decision seeing as how you’re in an adult relationship.
Cons
You’re In Love
You’re definitely basing your decisions on emotion, only! Girl, where is the logic? You only spend time together on the weekends. You’ve only seen the best parts of him, are you ready for all the ugly that lies underneath? Are you ready to expose your ugly as well? There is no running back to your own place when things get rocky. Moving in together means not just physically but emotionally, mentally and spiritually as well. That’s a lot of baggage on move in day.
The Grass Isn’t Always Greener
Sure you’re saving on gas and rent. Money has stacked up in your savings account but what about all the things around that house, aka chores! Forgot about those huh? Who washes the dishes? Does laundry? Cleans the bathroom? What if your partner is pretty laissez-faire and your OCD to the max? That definitely won’t go well and someone is going to go insane!
No Back-Up Plan
Back when you had your own place you always had another place to go when things got heavy. The trash didn’t get taken out for the umpteenth time and you’re over it. Now you all are arguing and guess who looks stupid in front of someone they just argued with, with no place to go! You!! Of course, it may not be that petty but things aren’t always peachy keen and when you move in together dealing with your problems head on is in fine print on the lease agreement.
With those things in mind, maybe your conversation with bae can be a little more in depth. Weigh your pros and cons as you would any other major decision in life. If you do decide to move in with your partner lay out boundaries, respect them as you would anyone else and have fun!
-HCxo