Small liberal arts school fomo is so real. Scrolling through your social media and seeing friends at football games in huge stadiums decked out in their school colors or wild frat parties with furniture burning on the front lawn and thinking to yourself, “am I missing out on the college experience?” Or maybe it’s a Thursday night and your friends from high school are out at a party but you’re in your dorm because no one at your school throws parties on Thursdays. It’s the worst feeling and if you’re like me and many of my friends- you start to spiral, “should I transfer?’ “Am I missing out on my youth???” But calm down. Let me tell you how I learned to stop stressing about this and why everything is okay and you didn’t make a huge mistake- in fact you made a great choice.
First off, here are some ways to satisfy your craving for a more vibrant, large-scale social scene. As much as I can explain why the small school experience is great-let’s be real, that doesn’t erase the desire for a taste of the big school vibe. So, check out a bigger school nearby and crash their parties! Get tickets to a college football game! Go visit a friend for a weekend at a big university! Consider studying abroad—immerse yourself in the nightlife while overseas. Plus, spending less time on your home campus will make your time there feel more special and memorable when you return. There are lots of ways to get doses of that large campus energy.
All that being said, here’s the thing: I have close friends at big “party schools,” and I’ve visited them. And yeah, they’re a lot of fun—for a weekend. But if that were my constant lifestyle, I think I’d be totally exhausted and burnt out. Not only that but it’s a very predictable formula that gets old quickly. I feel like I get so many more unique and diverse experiences at my smaller school. So go find ways to get your fill of that bigger school experience. Have a great time visiting but take notice of the little things that aren’t as shiny as they are on social media- like how you wait forever just to get turned away from a frat party that’s needlessly exclusive, or realizing you don’t know anyone around you, so you always stick with the same group you came out with. Don’t get me wrong there is a great time to be had in these settings but I always feel grateful to return to my own school, where it feels like I know everyone on a night out and my friends and I can safely side quest. Where I never have to worry about competing for social opportunities or getting on “the list”.
It’s important to reframe your perspective and redefine “the college experience”. Try to let go of your narrow perception of what college should look like. Think about what you want to get out of college and not what you thought you should want out of college. And remember to be grateful and focus on the opportunities you have that you wouldn’t at a big university- small classes, relationships with professors, better sense of community, etc. You miss out on these things at a big school. And these are super important aspects of college.
At a small school you have to try a little harder to shape the experience you want but it’s worth it in the long run. Because the range of stories, random adventures and truly special memories you’re able to collect are endless with some effort. Here’s an example; it’s a Friday and my friends and I want to go do something. None of the sports teams can throw, no college bars have anything going on. So instead of mopping and settling for nothing, we go to a local bar in town that’s frequented mostly by older residents in the area. We had the best time. We played pool, we danced, we talked with interesting people. The owner of the bar even gave us her number so we could be in touch about organizing an event there to advertise the spot to more college kids. Anything can be fun with a good attitude and good company.
So moral of the story- get off campus! Explore! Check out nearby towns, go for hikes. Change up your weekends. Go on a road trip to the nearest big city. Go play laser tag with your friend group. Maybe find some local bar to go to with your friends-it might not be a crazy rager but it might make for a hilarious story. And isn’t that what the college experience is all about anyway?