Season 2 of HBO’s Insecure has come and gone and whether you’re #TeamIssa or #TeamLawrence, I’ve decided, like most dedicated viewers, to spend my time wisely while waiting for season 3. And by wisely, I mean overanalyzing every controversial episode and sharing my even more controversial thoughts on the Internet.
Episode 6 of Season 2 (“Hella Blows“) features Issa, Molly, Kelli and Tiffany, who all decide to attend a sex convention. It’s here that the ladies touch on the subject of blowjobs. Fellatio. Giving head. Slobbing on the nob (like corn on the cob). Brain. Sucking d*ck. I’m going to list a few issues the girls brought up, then give my two cents about it.
- Condoms
While an advocate for safe sex, I see no point in using condoms while giving head. I understand the theory, though. Listen. Here’s how I see it. If I feel the need to have to put a condom on your penis in order for me to put said penis in my mouth, then I’d rather pass on the entire hookup. And to be really real… if you’re doing it right, the balls should be in your mouth, too. I’ve never seen a condom that covers the shaft of the penis and the balls, so.
- Oral Sex During Random Hookups
Issa (think 21 Savage, not Rae) no from me. Okay, look. I hate to say it, but I’m all for the double standard in this situation. Foreplay, in favor of the woman, is almost always required during sex. Quick anatomy/biology/chemistry lesson: A woman’s sexual arousal is often directly related to her level of lubrication. The wetter *cue Wetter by Twista* the vagina, the more enjoyable it is for both involved parties. This includes direct clitoral stimulation. Men don’t NEED oral sex to have an enjoyable sexual experience, but women do. And like I said before, I’m an advocate for safe sex. Condoms during penetrative sex is always a given, but this girl is not putting the d*ck of some random from the club in my mouth because that just isn’t what I do. Yes. I’d rather have a random latex covered penis inside of my body as opposed to a random raw penis in my mouth. And like Issa’s (think Rae, not 21 Savage) character said, the spitting, eye contact, gagging and lockjaw (all components of a great blowjob, btw) is just way too intimate for my taste. I’ll pass.
- Where to finish?
It is helpful to always establish clear sexual boundaries, especially with a person in with which you are in an active sexual relationship. In my opinion, yes. It was disrespectful as f*ck for Daniel to finish on Issa’s face, specifically in her eye. Call me dramatic, but I’ve always felt like finishing on someone’s face is almost like screaming “I don’t give a f*ck about you or your feelings” at the top of your lungs. Sh*t is complicated. The best solution I have is to state where you like him to finish as he’s exclaiming about how he’s almost done.
Example:
Him:   I’m about to c*m!
You: Â Â Okay, just not on my face.
           Okay, I’m going to swallow.
      Okay, I’m going to spit.
      Do it on my chest/ass/face/other body part.
Then have him proceed accordingly. As long as you’re cool with what is happening to your body and who is doing it to your body, then everything is fine. Consent is always the number one priority. So yeah, f*ck Daniel. I’m forever #TeamIssa&Lawrence.