For many, the holidays are filled with copious amounts of stress. Whether you are preparing to see estranged family members, dreading familial drama or struggling with the choice of whether or not to go home; it can be a mentally taxing time period.
Personally, I am not going home for the holidays. I will spare you the details of my drama-filled home life, but I no longer have a childhood home full of magic and love to visit, or my teenage bedroom kept as a time capsule to find comfort in. I now have my own apartment which my roommates and I have worked hard to make our own traditions and magic in. While I find harbor in this new place I call home, it is sometimes hard to hear all of my friends’ plans for the holidays. I want to share their excitement about visiting their families, and their travel plans filled with joy, but at times it is hard knowing I will be spending most of my holiday time away from family. Seeing my family here and there is nice, but it is simply not the same as it was during my childhood. Holiday breaks were filled with snowball fights, movie days, and unlimited Christmas-themed adventures. It fills my heart with warm nostalgia thinking of how things used to be, but it also comes with an aftertaste of sadness, knowing how far my family has drifted from what it once was.
It is definitely hard not having close family ties at such a young age. This is a time in our lives when we need family to lean on and support us, but the good news is that we get to make our own traditions and build our own support system. I love my friends and I have built a great village to lean on.
I could mope and complain about feeling lonely or feel bad for myself. Or, I could switch my point of view. Yes, it may be sad and isolating to be alone, but it is also freeing to be independent, especially during the holidays. I get to write my own rules, make my own plans, and surround myself with people who uplift and love me. If you are reading this and find yourself in a similar situation, you are not alone either. I have to remind myself that this is something out of my control; I did not do anything to deserve this situation, but I do get to earn strength from prevailing and growing from my circumstances.
So, as I spend the holidays away from family, I will cherish the time I get to spend catching up with old friends as they return from their own schools, I will make new traditions, and do the holidays my own way, just how I like.