We are entering the preparation period for the finals week portion of the school year. I don’t know about you guys, but I have been feeling what’s called anticipatory anxiety. Have you ever known about a big event or major assignment coming up soon and started obsessing and stressing over it, even when there’s nothing to be done for it? For some people, it’s the feeling of dread before an interview, social event or major assignment; for others, they feel guilty for going out when they know there are things to be done at home. For me, it presents itself in the constant checking of grades, doing every calculation to see what grade is the lowest, and what grades I need to get on the last few assignments. Yet, the stress and anxiety aren’t pushing me to begin studying, completing all the assignments to the best of my ability, or even making sure I attend all my classes — it’s just causing me to lose sleep, lose hair and lose a little bit of sanity.
Mental health in students is a secondary priority for most, as we are in the last and most important stage of our academics. These are the years to put in the work and learn everything we can until we are spit out into the “real world.” This so-called “real world” is a scary thing for me — some nights give me more anticipatory anxiety than my actual school work.
The feeling of anticipatory anxiety can take up a large portion of life, especially for someone like me who is capable of stressing about something weeks ahead of time, so how do I learn to enjoy life without the overwhelming sense of dread hanging over my head?
This week, I really focused on enjoying the moment and letting that stress go. There is very little preparation that is absolutely dire enough to stop me from enjoying my life and going out, so that is exactly what I did this weekend.
I decided that a spontaneous road trip to Charlotte, North Carolina to see my favorite comedian, John Mulaney. That was just what the doctor ordered. I couldn’t help but feel the need to bring my computer and work on the next week’s assignments, but I forced myself to leave my bookbag at home and not think about it. The No. 1 rule was no discussing grades, class or anything school-related.
It was tricky distracting myself from the list of things that needed to be done before Monday came back around. The three-hour car ride gave me ample time to make the list in my head. Instead of just worrying and adding things to the list, I wrote them down as reminders on my phone, assigning each errand and assignment to different days to balance the week. Then, I just had to let it go.
The biggest part of letting it go was reminding myself that there is nothing else at that moment I could do about the situation — I was as prepared as I could be. I had done everything necessary before I left. Whatever Canvas notification I got was going to be what it was. The relief I felt when I realized that whatever happens is going to happen was so freeing. I was able to enjoy the time with my friends, and I got to laugh harder than I ever have.
It can be hard to let it go when the stress feels mandatory or validated. However, it is important to remember that you are allowed to enjoy your life. School is not the be-all-end-all. You won’t remember every flashcard you made or how many hours you spent studying Quizlet, but you will remember the little moments you took with friends for yourself. More important than the memories, you learn the importance of actually living. So often, college can feel like a cycle of classes and assignments, but these are the last few years we are all together in a community like Blacksburg. I think this to be the greatest lesson to learn in college — when the “real world” does finally come to take us away, if we haven’t learned to enjoy life despite the homework, we won’t be able to find moments to enjoy until retirement. So, buy those concert tickets, go out with friends, and take that mental health day.