Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
placeholder article
placeholder article

Keeping Sex Interesting for a Committed Collegiette

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Virginia Tech chapter.

I love sex, I do. I love it. I like how it makes me feel, and I like knowing how it makes my partner feel. Fellow Collegiette™ nymphos hopefully you are pickin’ up what I’m puttin’ down- this is about the nitty gritty. However, when you’re in a long-term relationship sometimes sex can become monotonous. You have those three or four positions that are guaranteed to make you climax almost immediately, and you know exactly what to do to make your partner finish in a timely fashion. Who has time anymore for those lovely summer romps that last forever and leave you sweaty and satisfied? Midterm time is fast approaching and it’s high time for those afternoon quickies that are sweet and sassy; leaving you enough time to grab a coffee before that boring evening class begins. Understandably, I’ve had several friends approach me and ask how to spice up their sex lives with their long-term partners, and so, here I go.

First off, communication and comfort are key. If your communication is off with your man, your sex is going to be off. Be open. Be comfortable. Tell him what feels good, and tell him what feels great! Show him where the hot spots are, even guide his hands and body if you need to. Don’t be afraid to take control. Give him feedback when he tries things, and be OPEN to trying things yourself. Nothing is more frustrating than a partner who is stuck in a rut and thinks it’s their way or the highway. If something hurts or doesn’t feel quite right pull the E-brake immediately and figure out what’s going on. Be able to laugh if something doesn’t play out quite as planned (you know those awkward noises that appear out of nowhere, and the gawky position changes that leave you with a Charlie horse). News flash- they happen to everyone. Seriously. Try being open and honest, and letting yourself get to the root of the problem. You’re dating that person for a reason, and hopefully that leads to an ability to talk to them and be yourself, and most importantly to have fun together!
 
Okay, now that you’re comfortable and feeling a littler adventurous, change it up. If you have sex once a week at the same time and in the same manner, you might get that weekly orgasm (seriously, who wants just one?), but it’s going to get boring. After having sex with someone consistently for a few weeks, months, or years, you’re going to know what makes them tic and what makes them toc. If not, re-read the paragraph about communication and take a moment to analyze what the f#%$ you’re doing with that person. Try having sex at least once a day. Throw in a new position that you, or your partner, have been thinking about. Try something that you feel is a little bit scandalous. Maybe try a frolic in public, or an intense make-out sesh (M.O.S) in the back corner of a dark movie theatre (corny, but make up your own sh-t people!!). Take a hot shower together, after deflowering the floor of the new apartment’s bathroom, or maybe hit the kitchen counter. Do more than the routine. The possibilities are endless, especially when you throw a little role-play in there.

 

If you have sex frequently and you’re feeling bored with the same ole stuff, try taking a couple days off (from sex, not from each other!). Let the sexual energy build up a little bit. Wait long enough so you really want it, even to the point where you need it. I love the days off that leave me wanting more. The days where I send my boyfriend the dirty pictures and the naughty texts insinuating what will happen when we reunite. Another tip: be the bad girl. Embrace the inner raunch Collegiettes™! Send the racy texts that will get his blood moving (pun intended). A naughty pic now and again reminds your man that you want him to be excited to feel you, and that he’s with the girl every man dreams about. Back to waiting it out, I might start getting cranky after a couple days, but when the times comes that my boyfriend and I give up holding out on each other, I put my everything into it, and I come out satisfied.

 
Also, don’t be modest. Let yourself hop on top, bend over, and put those legs up. I’ve talked to fellow Collegiette’s™ who only get freaky when they’ve been drinking. I think this is a confidence issue. Be confident with your body and your abilities as the pleasure provider at all times. Your partner is not looking at the imperfections, trust me. They’ll be so taken aback by your wild side that those imperfections will disappear into the oblivion of passion and fun. Let yourself get into sex sober. Make as much noise as you want (screw your roommates!).  If you let yourself get wild, your man will respond accordingly, guaranteed. Super hint: while giving head, love it. A lot of girls say they don’t like giving head, that’s fine, but during the moments however brief, and if at all, give your man the pleasure of knowing you’re getting something out of it. On that note, tell him he’s beautiful and show your affection by reaching for those tingly places when he isn’t expecting it. Let your excitement for the coming attraction get the best of you, ask for previews, but don’t lose sight of the sensual-ness of “making love” to the person you are in fact in love with.
 
These are just a couple tips, and can be applied to everyone, not just couples and heterosexual partners. I highly recommend letting yourself have fun while having sex, and keeping sex interesting and new. Sex is a great stress reliever, and is a beautiful and fun process when performed correctly! Happy sexing Collegiette™!

sources taken from :

http://www.manosterone.com/2011/05/9-tips-for-showering-with-a-lady/

http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/smitten/2010/06/my-most-awkward-sexual-experie-17.html

Her Campus Placeholder Avatar
Laura Baugh

Virginia Tech

Laura Baugh is a senior at Virginia Tech where she is double majoring in Communications and Film. When not busy with school, Laura enjoys editing film and video, being the general manager at VTTV, spending time with her amazing sisters in Gamma Phi Beta, playing her guitar, and reading Her Campus! She is also obsessed with her school's athletics. Go Hokies!