Growing up, I was constantly surrounded by nothing besides love and support. My parents have always given me their unconditional love, and I never once doubted it. My brother would never fail to be there for me, and even if he didn’t show it, I knew he loved me. I always felt supported by my grandparents, aunts, uncles…, and the list goes on.
I couldn’t ask for a better upbringing. The love shown to me was something I learned to translate to other people.
Personally, I think one of my best qualities is being overly loving and loyal to the people I care for in my life. I would drop anything at any moment to be there for someone because I know it would be reciprocated.
But what happens when it’s not reciprocated anymore?
This is something I struggle with. How do I just let someone go after years of friendship, laughter, and memories? I’ve been in some tough situations where some of my friendships would start to deteriorate because it felt so one-sided – as if I was the only one putting in effort to continue the relationship. My gut instinct is to always look on the bright side, give people a second chance, and stay optimistic.
But how long can that continue? How long do I continue to text first, ask to spend time together, and put in effort? I can’t grapple the fact that it’s time to let someone go. But I know that it isn’t healthy.
Going to college has further complicated this journey of friendships. It often feels like relationships form and fade in the blink of an eye. The fleeting moments spent with potential friends can leave us yearning for deeper bonds, yet the constant rush often pushes us apart. It’s a bittersweet reality: the excitement of new beginnings comes with the weight of potential loneliness.
Recently, I received one of the best pieces of advice for this:
“Sometimes you have to give up on people, not because you don’t care, but because they don’t.”
This is harsh, but it has helped me understand my worth, and my love and loyalty deserve to be mirrored. It does suck – it’s gut-wrenching to let go of someone that has had a heavy presence in your life. However, I am a constant believer in the fact that everything, indeed, does happen for a reason.
This is why I found the strength to finally leave behind these people and focus on the current healthy relationships in my life. I’m a firm advocate of the idea that people come into your life for a reason.
Ultimately, those past relationships are chapters in my story—lessons learned that shape who I am and guide me in what to seek in the future. Each experience makes me stronger, and I’ve come to value that growth.