Deciding to participate in sorority recruitment is a pretty big decision that often comes with lots of excitement, nerves, and maybe even frustration. For me, the stress and exhilaration of rush week allowed me to reflect a lot on who I am as a person.
- The days are long
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This aspect of rush is one that I was warned about, but I didn’t fully understand just how tired I would be until I was already immersed in the process. Most days of the week I was waking up around 4:45am and not returning until after sunset. Each day of recruitment I had back-to-back houses which kept me very busy. Rushing around Oak Lane in heels and dresses in January is not for the faint of heart. In earlier rounds, I only spoke to each recruiter for about 5 to 15 minutes. Because of this, the conversations are very surface level, and you often repeat topics from house to house or even from recruiter to recruiter, which can be exhausting. Sorority rush was very rewarding, but by far the most draining week I have experienced since coming to college.
- i had to face rejection (a lot)
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This lesson is another one that seems obvious but was so much different than I expected. At Virginia Tech, there are 13 Panhellenic sororities. Each PNM—potential new member—can only receive a bid from one sorority. This means that I started this process knowing that 12 sororities would tell me no. I tried not to worry too much about this and trust the process because everyone is in the same boat. However, receiving my first schedule and seeing that I did not have the maximum number of invites back was certainly discouraging. I also had to accept that the process is largely out of my control. All that I could do was make sure that I was engaged, polite, and showing my personality throughout all of my conversations. The outcomes following my time in each house were predominantly out of my hands. There are a million reasons why I could have been dropped by houses and it doesn’t mean that I wasn’t liked or wouldn’t have fit in, but it definitely created a lot of anxiety for me surrounding the rest of the recruitment process. I tried my best to focus on what I loved about the houses that remained rather than the what-ifs of the houses that were no longer on my list.
- outfits aren’t everything
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Over winter break while I was preparing for recruitment, I was constantly reading articles and watching TikToks to determine what I should wear for each round. Sorority recruitment does have a dress code, with each round becoming progressively more formal. However, as long as you are dressed appropriately and put in effort, your outfits do not matter nearly as much as you think they do. I bought way more outfits than I needed because I felt like I couldn’t find anything that was perfect and would really wow my recruiters. After the first day of recruitment in the pouring rain, I realized that prioritizing comfort is important. This way, I could really focus on the conversations I was having instead of having the urge to fidget with my outfit. Also, recruiters encounter so many PNMs each round and are trying their best to remember important details from each conversation, so what you’re wearing is not their main focus. Dressing up for recruitment should be fun, so try not to stress too much.
- staying true to myself was hard
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During recruitment, I struggled much more with trying to appeal to others than I expected. Recruitment is a very personalized experience; everyone is looking for something different and has unique experiences and values. Because of this, it is very important to keep to yourself and not discuss houses with others during the week. It is possible that during the recruitment process you will hear negative comments about houses that you feel you belong in. I remember becoming very upset during recruitment because I didn’t know how ending up in a particular sorority could influence what people thought of me. This was a dangerous mindset that made the recruitment experience more stressful for me. I was so disappointed in myself for caring about impressing or satisfying other PNMs. By participating in sorority rush, I learned that I am susceptible to feeling pressure to fit in, but I am capable of overcoming it. The most important thing to remember about joining a sorority is that you should be making decisions fully based on your own experiences because it is your journey and no one else’s.
- every sorority has my kind of people
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The final thing that I learned throughout the recruitment process that helped ease my nerves was that realistically, I could find my people in any sorority. Most sororities at Virginia Tech have around 200 members. Each of these women have their own personalities, goals and interests. Each Panhellenic chapter is made up of beautiful, strong and kind women. At the end of the day, we are all a part of the same community. Although not knowing where I would end up was scary, it is hard to go wrong. I found people in my sorority who I absolutely love. However, all of my closest friends are in completely different sororities and others are not in sororities at all. By knowing women all across the panhellenic community, I can confidently say that I could have made incredible friends in any chapter. If you’re reading this and are considering joining a sorority in the future, know that you can too.
If you also went through recruitment at Virginia Tech, I’m sure you can understand how emotional of an experience it is and the ways in which it helps you to grow as a person. For those of you who chose not to participate in recruitment and are considering doing so in the future, I hope this article provides some insight about what the experience may be like. I recommend going through recruitment if you are interested in potentially joining a sorority because it is a highly educational experience in which you get to learn about all of the chapters and more importantly, yourself.