So today a friend of mine sent me a picture that tickled me but also made me think. It was a picture that had the words “BLACK GIRL HAIR PRODUCTS” and on one side, it said 1996 and under that was a picture of Just For Me relaxer. The other side said 2016 and under that one there was an assortment of Shea Moisture & Cantu products. It was just a cute picture at first then I started thinking how beautiful it was. I know that sounds really cheesy but think about it on a deeper level. We have made it to an age where girls are rocking these big beautiful Afros, these coconut oil coated curls and being completely unapologetic about doing so. We went from girls “fixing their hair” to girls working with what they had. Now let’s just think about the phrase “fix your hair” for a second. It’s totally okay to say that to someone when their hair looks messy and undone but all too often messy and undone gets confused with coily or natural. To tell someone to fix how their hair naturally comes out of their head is to imply that they (even if it is just one aspect of their being) is inadequate and in need of altering. Even the fact that we call perm relaxeris problematic. That sort of mentality is way more detrimental than we tend to realize. Don’t get me wrong if you don’t wear your hair natural there is nothing wrong with that. Do whatever it is that makes you happy, just make sure you know why it makes you happy. If you are relaxing perming your hair because you want to, because you just want you hair like that, then by all means go ahead and perm it love. On the other hand if you find that you are perming your hair to try and reach Euro-Centric beauty standards, because you think that straight hair makes you more attractive, please put the perm box down venture over to the natural hair care section to begin your journey to being natural.
I didn’t know just how damaging that mind set was until I went natural in my junior year of high school. I was too scared to do the big chop so I just grew out my perm. That little in between stage was kinda ehh because I had no idea what to do with half and half hair. Then when I got all natural?! I felt unstoppable. I noticed a change in my self esteem; it was filled with a little more pride than before. I didn’t know what I was doing when I went natural but now I know I took on my natural state and told myself “You’re perfect how you are and you’re in control of how you come”,and I’ve never looked back. I twist my hair almost every night, taking care with each twist or braid and I go to bed with this excitement for what that work will look like in the morning. Now, everytime I turn around I find myself trying to convince someone else to join the natural wave. It’s a lot of work, almost like a full time job, but in my experience it’s so worth it. So if you haven’t already, come on over to the curly side I promise you won’t regret it. :)