When I arrived at university last year, campus magazines and advice sites were flooded with remedies for the dreaded freshers’ flu. So, I stocked up on vitamin c tablets (life savers btw) and tissues, assuming I would beat this horrible bug.
And I did, three months later. I don’t think I’ve ever coughed that much in my life.
One thing I was not prepared for, though, was the overwhelming homesickness I felt. There wasn’t a quick fix remedy for such a feeling, no syrups, or tablets to battle it. I could fight the physical symptoms I had to face, but the mental ones were not so simple.
Eventually, though, I found some things to help.
So, here is my first aid kit to tackle the second, less spoken about, ailment that freshers brings – homesickness.
Photos, photos, photos:
What’s the best thing to do when you’re missing the faces of those you love? Put their faces where you can see them! Sometimes having photos up is hard because it is a reminder of what you don’t have with you, but I promise that putting up photos of those you miss will help that homesickness immensely. You can look at all the happy times you shared with those people and know that there are more to come when you have breaks from uni. They will still have those same smiles when you see them in person again.
Music that reminds you of home:
Music is such a powerful thing and it’s no different when it comes to working as a remedy. I really wanted to bring my record player to university but left it in case there was no room; I’m MAKING room for it this year. Having familiar music that reminds you of a certain person or memory is like a pocket of magic taking you back to them. I loved listening to the Beatles when I moved in as they reminded me of singing in the car with my mum and dad, always the loudest of the group. It wasn’t the same as being back home but I certainly gave “I want to hold your hand” all I had in my many shower concerts.
Facetime your parents, siblings, and friends:
This is so important. I cannot emphasise the importance of keeping in touch with those you care about. Not just for your sake, but for theirs. If you don’t know when you will be free, set a time each week that you will call each person that’s important to you and try not to compromise on this. Of course, sometimes plans will get in the way, but that little snippet of home will remind you that they are still there. It also gives you an excuse to gossip about everything that you’ve missed out on or any drama that’s happening in your flat.
Accept that your friends will change and make new friends, just as you will:
It can be worrying to scroll through social media and see the friends you hold closest gathered around with strangers. They look just as close to them as they do you and jealousy can quickly creep in. But don’t let it take over! Remember that it is a good thing they are making new friends and that you are going to do the same. University is about growing and finding out who you are, new people come with that. This doesn’t mean they aren’t your friend anymore; it simply means they have more people to introduce you to when the time comes. If you’re super worried though, or such posts leave you missing them, see point 3. Just give them a call. I’m sure they’ll want to hear from you just as much as you want to call them.
Talk to someone you trust:
I know this seems tricky in those first couple of months when you are just getting to know everyone but know that all of your flatmates and course mates are going through the same thing. They all sat in their room, psyching themselves up to go into the kitchen and introduce themselves. If you feel you can talk to them about how you are feeling, go for it! They will be able to understand best. If not, call someone at home or talk to a member of staff (the Wellbeing Portal is open Monday to Friday 8.30am-5:00pm (Friday until 4:00pm)). Just whatever you do, don’t keep such feelings bottled up. They must spill out eventually and you don’t want that to be when you’ve had a bit too much to drink at pres.
Keep your hobbies from home:
One reason people struggle with homesickness is that they feel like they’ve lost their identity. The home version of themselves and the university version are two very different people. This doesn’t have to be the case! You are still you, just in a different place. Keep up whatever it was that made you happy at home, whether this be reading, knitting, movie watching or baking (your flatmates will be very grateful if you like the latter).
Cook what you would want to be on the table at home:
What was the one dish you were happy about being on the table when you got home from school as a kid? Or what’s a dish you never got to try at home? Use cooking as both a way to connect you to your favourite dishes back home and as a way to discover new things you love! This is my favourite list of homely meals that you can try:
https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/collection/comfort-food-recipes
Stay busy:
This won’t be tricky! From the moment you get to uni there is ALWAYS stuff going on. From freshers’ week, to course enrolment, to the actual seminars themselves, you’ll always have things to do. Just make sure you apply yourself to them and it’ll be the distraction you’ll sometimes need. There is something happening every day of freshers’ but this continues through term 1, so check the SU website for any events that you can get involved in. I remember I had a great time doing the crystal maze challenge last year so look out for that! And make the most of things to fill the day! Got a seminar at 1? Make a morning out of it and head out for coffee with your course mates before you start.
Know when you’re next heading home:
This is something that I have always found helpful as it gives me a date to look forward to if times get tough. Of course, you shouldn’t wish your studies away until you’re next home but having that cushion of knowing when you’ll be with your people again is a really nice comfort. Book a train or organise a date and you’ll know that you will 100% be home soon.
Let yourself be homesick, for a little while:
I know this contradicts what I’ve been saying but it really is important to accept the feeling of worry about being away from home. It’s a daunting experience and a completely natural reaction to have! Don’t force yourself to feel completely alright and allow yourself to miss home every now and then. Just use this first aid kit to help with the process, not ignore it altogether.
And that’s it! All the things that helped me through that tricky time. Don’t get me wrong I still struggle with being away from those I call home sometimes, but I promise it gets easier with every day and university slowly becomes a home in itself.