The Best (and Worst) Progresso Soups

During this quarantine, I have found that soup is a good source of comfort. Its warm, delicious (most of the time), and considerably healthy! Also, eating soup is a great way to spend your time. So, today I have decided to rank 10 different Progresso soups from worst to best. 

10. Vegetable Tomato Basil 

Tomato soup is the absolute worst kind of soup. There is no consistency, it’s just too wet – too wet to be considered soup in my opinion. Vegetable Tomato soup is almost equivalent to putting vegetables into flavored water and calling it soup. No thank you. 

9. Lasagna Style with Italian Sausage 

Lasagna has no business being a soup. It’s perfectly fine the way it is, why do we have to change it? And, where does the Italian Sausage come from? It sounds random, it tastes random. I’ll keep my lasagna in a pan, thank you very much. 

8. Vegetable 

Let me start by saying that the vegetables are NOT the problem with this soup. The vegetables are great, the proportion between pasta and vegetable is perfect. I want to talk about the broth. The broth in this soup is uncomfortably thick, and I’m really not sure what I’m tasting. Did they use the leftover tomato soup from Vegetable Tomato Basil? The world will never know. 

7. Vegetable Lentil 

Vegetable Lentil soup is the classic soup choice for old people eating lunch at a local diner after Sunday morning mass. Is it a bad soup? No. I just feel too young to embrace Vegetable Lentil at its fullest. 

6. Beef Pot Roast with Country Vegetables 

Let’s have a little lesson about the difference between soup and stew. The difference here is liquid. Liquid. Stew is thick. Beef Pot Roast with Country Vegetables in undeniably thick, and the fact that it comes in a soup can, is marketed as a soup, and has the word “soup” in the title makes me feel lied to. Stop playing games Progresso. 

5. New England Clam Chowder 

New England Clam Chowder is our middle man, the introduction into our superior soups. New England Clam Chowder soup has ideal consistency, it’s a little bit thick and a little bit wet. We’ve got some meaty bites in there and some soupy slurps. New England Clam Chowder is the perfect soup to eat when you don’t know how hungry you are, it will always suffice. Finally, its delectable creaminess makes New England Clam Chowder feel like comfort food, which is all anyone ever wants. 

4. Chicken and Wild Rice

You know the saying ignorance is bliss? Yeah, that’s how it is with Chicken and Wild Rice soup. If I can ignore the fact that 29% of the soup is actually sodium (660 mg to be exact), I can revel in the bliss of the beauty that Chicken and Wild Rice is. The ways in which the rice soaks up the broth drives me crazy, and adding chicken in that mix? Truly divine. 

3. Traditional Chicken Noodle 

I’ll admit it, I would be a monster if Traditional Chicken Noodle soup didn’t make it into my top three. Is there anything special about Traditional Chicken Noodle? Nope. Not at all. It’s probably as boring as it gets. However, we can’t deny all of the service Traditional Chicken Noodle has provided for families across the globe. If soup could get the Nobel Peace Prize, Traditional Chicken Noodle would have it in the bag. 

2. Split Pea and Ham 

Split Pea and Ham soup tastes like the memory of going over to grandmas house. You’re a little hesitant to go at first, but once you get there you’re having a grand time. Split Pea and Ham soup looks like a piece of furniture that needs to be dusted, but it never disappoints when it comes to flavor and quality. Personally, I love my grandma, so I’m giving grandma soup the #2 spot. 

1. Chicken and Herb Dumpling 

Chicken. And. Herb. Dumpling. A true gift. There’s nothing better than drinking some broth, eating some beloved chicken, and then sinking your teeth into a doughy mini dumpling. There’s no denying that Chicken and Herb Dumpling deserves the #1 spot on this list. Its the perfect soup because it is a combination of all the perfect and comforting ingredients. The broth isn’t overwhelming in flavor, it doesn’t draw my attention away from what matters, but it’s still drinkable. The chicken brings my heart back to classic chicken noodle. And the herb dumpling. Well, the herb dumpling taught me what true happiness is. 

“Some soups are more progressive than others” 

• Anonymous 

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