We all do it. We romanticize the things that we do for the sake of others. I think this is because our generation was raised on tacky cinema and the strenuous pressures of social media; we’ve developed this “imaginary audience” mentality, where we believe people are always watching us. I hate to tell you this (or maybe you’ll be relieved to hear it), but this just isn’t true. If we’re all thinking this, then we’re all more focused on ourselves than we are on the performance of others. Shakespeare says “All the world’s a stage,” but this doesn’t necessarily mean that we always need to be acting.
You know what I’m referring to. The morning after a night out, when your hair’s in an impossible knot and your mascara’s crusted to your upper lid, and your roommate asks you “how was last night?” You tell them it was amazing, because college parties are supposed to be. The reality is, you spent a good two hours sweating through your scalp and holding a lukewarm drink while someone broke a folding table in two with their torso. Maybe this is your idea of an iconic night, and if so, great! If not, then I’m here to tell you that that’s okay. Your college experience may not consist of any Project X parties, your first kiss might not happen on a baseball field, and your roommate might not turn into your best friend. So, stop putting all this pressure on yourself to be the main character that you see on the big screen, because sometimes it’s alright to just … well, be.
Teen movies have taught us to have these false expectations of reality, and these high expectations lead to disappointment when they aren’t realized. So, how do you detach yourself from these expectations? One piece of advice that might help is to remember the motivation behind movies: to entertain. Of course when you see a movie about university or college life, the plot is going to offer up some obscure and exaggerated scenarios to keep the audience engaged. Here’s a life hack: the only person who has to be actively engaged in what you are doing at all times is you. The truth is, there are a lot of aspects of university that are simply mediocre. But, this is where you can change the narrative. This is where you can simply be, by enjoying yourself in the small moments, and subsequently become the main character of your life for you—not for an audience.
University is a lot of navigating on your own. It’s a lot of wandering around campus looking for a good place to study, nights in because school’s piled up or because you didn’t catch the invite, and mornings where it takes every ounce of energy—and sixteen ounces of coffee—to pry yourself from your sheets. Although this might not be what you see your cinematic main character going through in their two hours of university life, I can promise you that it will be at the crux of your four years of academia. Last night isn’t always going to be “a movie,” and I think it’s time that we’ve realized that that’s okay. At the end of the day, no one’s rating your life on Rotten Tomatoes, and the only person who has to be satisfied with the outcome is you.
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