Since turning 22 last week, I have been reflecting on some of the things that I’ve learned about myself, life and anything else I can think of. So, here’s a list of 21 things I’ve learned by 21 years old!
1. Trust Your Gut
Your subconscious tends to understand more about a situation before your conscious mind does. If your gut is sending you a message, it’s probably for a reason. Listen to it.
2. Not Everyone is Going to Like You
This one is a hard pill to swallow. To be fair, you don’t like everyone you meet either. So, it makes sense that not everyone is going to like you, even if it’s not the best thing to think about. Just be yourself because changing your personality to try to impress someone is never worth it in the long run.
3. Setting Boundaries is Important
I have always found it hard to set boundaries because I’m such a people pleaser. I don’t like hurting other people’s feelings, even if it means hurting my own in the process. But this year, I’ve been setting boundaries more often since I’ve realized how important it is to put yourself and your mental health first.
4. Failure is Okay
As hard as it is to experience and learn to be okay with failure, it is a part of life and isn’t always a bad thing. When one door closes, another one opens.
5. Being Comfortable Alone
I used to hate being alone because it would feel so lonely, but now I love it. I’ve found that doing things by myself has not only increased my independence, but it has also helped boost my confidence.
6. Relationships Are Always a Choice
You always have the choice of who you surround yourself with. Sometimes it may feel like you’re stuck in a relationship with a person who brings you down, but you just have to find a way to say no and put yourself first. Focus on surrounding yourself with those who love and care for you, and cut off those who ultimately don’t make you happy. Protecting your own peace is important.
7. Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help
Asking for help can be scary because it means admitting that you can’t do everything by yourself, and it involves giving up a bit of control. But no one can do everything by themselves, and asking for help isn’t a weakness. Being able to ask for help is an asset and can sometimes mean the difference between failing and succeeding.
8. Remember to Acknowledge Your Success
At some point in your life, you were dreaming about being in the exact position that you’re in now. Sometimes, you just need to take a step back and acknowledge how far you’ve come. I’ve found that a little bit of gratitude and reflection can change your whole perspective on where you currently are in life.
9. Complaining is a Good Release (Sometimes)
Complaining can be a good way to get rid of frustration, and I love complaining as much as the next person, but there comes a point when it’s just too much. If something is bothering you to the point where you are constantly complaining about it, you might as well put in the work and try to fix your situation.
10. You Are Your Biggest Enemy
As much as you may not believe it, most people around you are actively rooting for you to succeed. The idea that people enjoy seeing you fail is all in your head. Self-doubt is the enemy of progress; you have to push past your doubts and focus on believing in yourself, just like your support system does.
11. Don’t Focus on the Past
As much as the past has played a major role in shaping you into the person you are today, you must be able to put it behind you if you want to move forward. I believe that everything happens for a reason (to an extent) and you have to keep going forward.
12. You Can Do Anything You Set Your Mind To
I feel as though I tend to put myself in a box when it comes to the expectations that I have for my life and what I think I can achieve. But lately, I’ve started to realize that as long as I truly believe in myself and put in the work, I can accomplish whatever I want.
13. Be Kind to Everyone
This is a big one for me. I always try to be nice to everyone I meet and not judge them because it takes so much more effort to be mean than it does to be nice. I don’t understand the point of being unnecessarily mean anyway.
14. Budgeting is Important
I used to have a bit of a spending problem, so this year I decided to start budgeting and keeping track of what I’m spending. I’ve really reeled in the amount of money that I’m spending and find myself saving more money as a result.
15. Your Only Real Competition is Yourself
Constantly comparing yourself to others is the quickest way to put yourself in a bad mood and can cause you to feel inferior. The only comparison that really matters is between you and your past self, so try to focus on your own journey.
16. Social Norms are a Scam
Societal expectations are constantly changing; the pressure society puts on you to fit in a certain box is a bunch of rubbish. If you want to do something that might be outside the “norm,” do it. Honestly, who cares! As long as you’re an overall good person, what you do with your life isn’t anyone else’s business.
17. You Can’t Control Everything
Unfortunately, some things are out of your reach. So, accept that it’s out of your hands and try to trust the process.
18. Good Things Come to an End
There have been a lot of “eras” of my life that I’ve loved and miss dearly. But you have to cherish those memories and look forward to the next good thing that will come your way, rather than living in the past.
19. It’s Your Parents’ First Time Experiencing Life, Too
When I first heard this phrase, it felt like a punch to the gut. Growing up, especially during high school, I always thought that my parents knew anything and everything about life, and because of that, I held them to such high standards. But I’ve realized how important it is to cut them some slack because they’re still learning how to live life, too.
20. Your Comfort Zone Will Kill You
As much as I’m scared of change, I’ve learned that it’s important to push yourself out of your comfort zone every once in a while in order to grow as a person and learn more about yourself.
21. Life is Not That Serious!
What’s the point of life if you don’t live it to its fullest and have fun with it? I know there are many obligations, rules and necessities to think about, but life is simply too short to not do the things that you desire and avoid chasing your dreams, even if they scare you. So, embrace the chaos of life, but don’t forget to enjoy the ride while you’re at it.