There is a misconception that being introverted means that you are just shy or quiet. While that might be true for some individuals, most people agree that introverts are also introspective and reflective. We can all agree that in front of the right crowd, introverts can be some of the loudest, most outgoing and frankly most extroverted people. As a highly introverted person myself, it can sometimes be hard to convey to others how draining socializing can be, yet how easy it is to socialize with specific people. To combat the stigmatized shy-and-quiet-introvert archetype, I present: “An Introvert’s Guide to Socializing”. Here are some strategies I use that I think will be helpful for others when socializing as an introvert.
Say Hello to Someone New Everyday
I think for most introverts, the first stage of meeting someone can be the most difficult; at least , that is the case for me. A great way to meet new people and potentially make someone’s day is to say hello to a new stranger every day and compliment them. Whether you are sitting beside someone new in class, standing beside someone waiting to cross the street, or even just in an elevator together, say hello and have a quick, light-hearted conversation. Personally, saying hello to people and making an effort to compliment them has helped my small-talk skills, although they are admittedly still subpar.
Thank Customer Service Workers
Building off the previous point, a beneficial way to show appreciation to customer service workers and help make you more comfortable speaking to others is to thank them and talk loudly when you speak to them. Admittedly I am far too quiet when trying to speak, especially when wearing masks and behind plexiglass. However, speaking up to thank customer service workers, who admittedly see some unsavoury customers, can make their day and help you become louder and more comfortable speaking in crowded settings.
Make a Point of Texting/Calling a Person You Want to Get to Know
I describe being introverted to my friends as having a social battery that charges through alone time and self-soothing activities. As I speak to others throughout the day, it slowly drains and will need to be recharged. However, making sure to take the time to talk to people you want to get to know is important, as they could become the ones who don’t drain your social battery in the future.
Socialize With the People that Don’t Drain Your Social Battery
Speaking of a social battery, everyone has one; whether it charges from alone time or starts empty and charges from spending time with others, knowing what works for you is crucial. There will always be people in your life that make socializing feel effortless. It’s important to make time for the people that leave you feeling better, and not as though you need alone time immediately. For example, my family and boyfriend are my go-to people to talk to about whatever I want, and I feel better after our conversations. So, keep fostering those connections and take time for people who leave you feeling good.
Get Out of Your Comfort Zone (But Not Too Much)
Lastly, as an introvert, I tend to stay in my social comfort zone and not enter situations that make me feel awkward. I think this is the same for many, but lots of benefits can come out of trying new things. Perhaps go to a party or socialize with a new group of friends. Doing these things can help you build new relationships and become more comfortable with trying new things. Remember not to push yourself too far, and it’s okay to come home after and get some “you-time” to recharge.
I hope these tips can help introverts and anyone looking for ways to improve their social life! Remember, there’s always time to make new friends and reconnect with old ones. By taking small steps, you can make sure socializing is a positive aspect of your life.