Your friendly neighbourhood introvert here!
Over the years, I’ve noticed I often gravitate towards extroverted people, even though I’m introverted myself, and I thought I would write a little something for all my outgoing friends out there. Let’s start with definitions so everyone is on the same track.
An introvert is someone who likes their alone time, or smaller group settings. There’s also a wide range of introverts! Some mild, who enjoy socializing (just not all the time) and some extreme, who are truly comfortable with a solitary life.
An extrovert is someone who loves social situations. You’ll rarely find them alone or not doing something. Like introverts, they can vary from mild to extreme. Some are outgoing and love being around others but value alone time, while others can’t stand to be alone.
And then you have your ambiverts; people who like to slide around the spectrum, enjoying time with friends, but also relishing time alone. Honestly, I would describe myself as an ambivert, or maybe an introverted extrovert, but let’s not make this too complicated.
We’re not actually hermits
We definitely enjoy our alone time, but don’t think we’re boring. Being introverted doesn’t mean you stay in your room all the time. Many introverts enjoy going out, they just prefer to do so independently.
…But we often do enjoy staying in to watch Netflix in our sweats.
Don’t give up on us!
Just because we enjoy being alone, doesn’t mean we don’t want to be invited places. It’s possible that 6/10 times you invite us out to parties we’ll pass up the opportunity… But sometimes we’ll say yes! Don’t give up on us. In my experiences, I’ve had friends get frustrated with me for not coming out often, but personally I’m not a huge fan of clubbing or big social gatherings. Introverts are much more likely to say yes to events that feature a smaller group setting.
Alone doesn’t mean lonely
I know a lot of extroverted people that don’t understand why someone would want to be alone, but just because we’re staying in on a Friday night doesn’t mean we’re lonely! It just means we’ve got a big night of binge watching/reading ahead.
You get us out of our comfort zones
We actually love extroverted people because they are great for getting us out of our comfort zones. When we finally do decide to emerge from our solitude, we know extroverts will have something planned!
We live vicariously through your adventures
Personally, I love having extroverted friends because I know they always have a story to tell. Most of the time it sounds crazy to me because it’s not something I would ever do, but it’s so fun to hear about.
Although sometimes you can be a little much
Not everything has to be some big adventure story. Give us a minute to catch up before you launch into some crazy story.
We don’t understand your energy
How can you always be doing stuff?? Don’t you need to recharge after social situations? No? Just us?
We can be jealous of you
You’re always down for anything! You seem to know someone everywhere you go, and if not, you make a friend. Teach me??
We enjoy socializing too
A lot of introverts actually LOVE socializing, but prefer to hang out either one on one or in small groups. Introverts are often more likely to need time alone after hanging out to “recharge.”
We’re often shy
If we’re close, you probably get confused when you bring us around new people and we get quiet, because you’re used to us being comfortable around you.
Or vice versa: when you first started getting close with us, you were probably surprised at how loud and crazy we can be. That means we’re comfortable around you and you’re awesome.
So anyway…dear extroverts, don’t it get it twisted, we love you.
(But maybe let’s stay in tonight)