Listen, we’ve all been there. Whether it’s due to a fear of commitment, emotional unavailability or just plain boredom, sometimes we end up in what we call an almost-relationship. You know, where you’re kind of dating, but also just friends, but also strangers (not to be confused with friends-with-benefits). So how exactly do you know if you’ve ended up in a situationship? Keep reading to find out.
1. There’s no title
A lot of people might think a situationship is just another term for friends-with-benefits (FWB), but you’d be wrong. A FWB has clear guidelines, and so do relationships. The thing about a situationship is that it’s meant to be ambiguous. So, if someone asks if you’re single (or seeing someone) and you have no idea what to say, that my friends, is a problem.
2. You mostly see each other at *ahem* nights
There’s nothing wrong with an old-fashioned booty call, but a situationship usually entails pretending like you’re dating to fill that loneliness in your heart without any of the actual commitment. This usually means one person hits up the other late at night under the guise of ‘wanting to talk’ or ‘needing someone.’ Usually, one thing leads to another and a lot of empty promises are made, none of which are fulfilled. But hey, at least you’re having some intimacy.
3. You spend a lot of time confused
This part is CRUCIAL. If at any point you can label the relationship, you’ve succeeded. Oftentimes people’s past baggage prevents them from wanting more. This can look like a lot of things: a fear of commitment, not wanting to get your heart broken or not wanting to be vulnerable with someone. At the end of the day, usually, someone ends up reaping all the emotional benefits of a relationship with none of the commitment. There’s also that grey area where people may get jealous but can’t actually say anything about it, because, ya know, you’re not actually together.
4. Your friends think it’s a terrible idea
I know, I know, you shouldn’t blindly follow what your friends tell you to do. But the thing is, love (or confusion) can lead to rose-coloured glasses, aka a lack of awareness of what’s really going on. If your friends groan every time you mention their name or consistently tell you that you can do better, they might be onto something here.
5. You’re reading this article
I mean come on sis, it’s a sign. If you have to read an article to figure out what’s going on, it’s time to let them go.
These are just a few of the signs that you’re in a mess. While it may seem fun in the short run, situationships are not worth the confusion or hurt they bring in the long run. Save yourself the trouble and just buy a vibrator and a self-care book.