Valentine’s Day is almost upon us, and since we’re also in the middle of Lockdown 2.0, this year probably won’t be what a lot of us expected.
In my case, I haven’t seen my partner in a month, and we’re not sure whether we’ll be able to spend Valentine’s Day together this year. We don’t normally do anything crazy, but we’re a couple who likes to spend as much time together as possible, so we’ve been struggling with this second round of lockdown. Luckily, we’ve come up with a few things to help make the distance more manageable, and with V-Day right around the corner, I thought I would share some of those things with all of you who might also not be able to see your partners on the day of love.
Texting Often
This is pretty self-explanatory, but it’s also super important. Talking often can really help when you find yourself missing your partner, and can make you feel connected even though you can’t be together in person. It’s also a great way to stay up to date on what’s going on in your partner’s life. Whether you’re big texters normally and want to up your text game to help manage the distance, or if you’re not normally a texter but the distance is getting to you, try texting your partner a little more frequently and see what happens.
Video Calls
You know what’s even better than texting? Phoning. Hearing your partner’s voice can help you get a better sense of how they’re feeling and make you feel more connected. And guess what’s even better than phone calls. Video chats!
That’s right, FaceTime and Discord’s video features are a lifesaver for long-distance relationships. While seeing my partner and not being able to be near him can be tough, getting to look at his face and hear his voice makes being apart a hundred times easier. I’m an anxious person, and sometimes I have a hard time with text messages because the tone is so easy to misinterpret, so getting to video call with my partner most nights hasn’t only been a huge relief, but it’s made the distance way easier to handle.
Watching Shows Together
Since we’re in lockdown, it can be kind of tricky to find things to talk about if you and your partner are calling and texting regularly. You can only say, “yeah, I sat at home and ate an entire bag of chips while listening to Disney music” so many times before it starts to get repetitive. That’s why it can help to find something to do together. For my partner and I, having a show that we watch together has been great: we watch on Netflix Party while video calling, and we make fun of the show, discuss what we think will happen next and just chat. Having that thing to do together can help make you feel closer, even though you can’t physically be together.
Playing Minecraft
Like watching a TV show, finding a game to play together and be passionate about can be great. For my partner and me, it’s Minecraft. I had never played before, so he’s been teaching me how the game works. It’s been really fun to build our little world and hang out with our cat, Miss Lady (who I love way more than anyone should love a pile of pixels who follows them around). My partner has big ambitious plans about building us a fancy house, and I, in true gremlin fashion, grab my little pickaxe and start digging tunnels under our house looking for diamonds. It’s pretty awesome. Plus it gives us something to come back to every night, and once I got familiar with the controls, we were able to talk while we played.
Lots of positive affirmation
Long-distance is really hard, and long-distance while in lockdown during a global pandemic is… really really hard. It takes a toll, and being able to give support to your partner, and receive support in return, can be super helpful. My partner and I spend a lot of time telling each other sweet things, asking about each other’s day, cheering on each other’s productivity and, most importantly, showing each other how much we love each other. Not to be too cheesy, but it can be really comforting to know that your partner is thinking about you and can’t wait to see you and kiss you as soon as they can.
Well, there you have it, a few of the things my partner and I are doing to stay connected during lockdown. These things have really helped us handle the distance, and keep the loneliness at bay. When I think about my partner, I get excited for when I can see him again, not sad that I can’t see him now, and I think that’s in large part due to all the steps we’ve taken to stay in touch during this time.
While my tips may not be what you and your partner need, the most important thing to remember is just to show up and take care of each other however you can during this difficult time. Besides, what better time to do that than on Valentine’s Day?