You wake up, snooze your alarm, you are late to your 8:30 A.M. class and boom it is the end of your university career. Now you are thinking “what am I doing?” Or you have been working hard in a job for years but wonder if it is what you should be doing during this time of your life? Regardless of if you are in your twenties or not, if you feel a bit lost I am here to tell you that you are NOT alone.
Just because someone you see every day at work or just randomly pass by on the street looks like they have everything figured out, does not mean they do have it all figured out. This happened to me a few times recently. A few people struck up a conversation with me as I am at the age where I should be graduating soon, and they asked me if I have a plan. Now I told these people briefly that it is okay to not have a one hundred percent plan. To give you more perspective, I am twenty-two years old and I have been in university for three years, taking a semester off leading into the summer and ultimately having eight consecutive months off, after already taking a gap year before starting university, so I constantly feel lost and behind. The majority of the people my age have graduated, and I am still in school purely since I have switched programs many times. On top of being in university, I work two part-time jobs and constantly wonder if I should keep working the hours I work while in school, feeling lost as if I should be like others who focus more on school.
What I have learned though is that you are never alone. The majority of people these days are worrying about the same thing. But, hey you have time. Just slow down and enjoy the ride. I think that there are many paths each of us can choose to go towards, and that choice takes many bad roads being travelled and that choice takes time. Sit back and enjoy the adventure.
I quite often ponder if I am doing enough with my time; I think it is one of those things when you have anxiety and you constantly think that you could be doing more. I also quite often feel lost with the people around me. I do not know about you guys, but some people have that effect on me, that even if they are not in my immediate friend circle, they drain my energy. They make my inner self feel lost in regards to how I handle things and why I just never speak my mind, and call out those around me who are disrespectful. Partly because I know some people will just never take responsibility for their actions, not seeing that they have hurt you. My mind constantly feels lost about how each scenario should be handled and if I am doing what is fair and right, to the best of my ability. If you ever have felt something along those lines and can relate, you can see that you are not alone.
Feeling lost in your twenties but really at any age can range anywhere from being near the wrong people, thinking you are a failure if your plan is not going the way you want, grades, program choices and many other external thoughts. Just know that your twenties are a considerable time between transition and self-discovery. It is perfectly okay to not have everything figured out to an exact science.
My advice as someone who struggles with this feeling every day, no matter if it is shown or not, is to honestly embrace the uncertainty, explore different interests and passions that you have and see what is right for you. Take baby steps; I find if I focus an extended period of time on goals, I get stressed out. Make small goals which will be more attainable and make you feel better each day. Talk to others, like I am doing right now with those of you who are reading, you are not alone, and it is nice to know that others feel a similar way so you can discuss how to feel better about the feelings inside your mind. Prioritize yourself and surround yourself with people who bring you joy, because what is worse when you feel lost and alone than being around people who drain you and who are unkind. We are all trying to figure out and steer the wheel of this thing called life, if someone goes out of their way to make you feel terrible, leave that situation. No one is worth making you feel more alone. Be patient in finding the right path for you, trust yourself to take one step at a time. Remember you are never alone, many of us feel confused and uncertain, but it is all a part of the journey, YOUR journey. Be kind to yourself.