Alexander 23 is someone that I discovered accidentally, but my continued habit of listening to him is not accidental. My sister and I went to an Alec Benjamin concert in Chicago during 2019 and Alexander 23 was the opener. I remember when he began playing my sister and I looked at each other and were so shocked! The lyrics alone piqued my interest and I waited for months to hear the songs he played at the concert to be released.
Over the next few years, he blew up, mainly due to his activity on TikTok. Songs like “IDK You Yet” and “Cry Over Boys” have soared to the top of the charts and now he is the main act at each of his concerts, not just the opener. He has released a couple of songs to start off 2022, but his most recent release was “Hate Me If It Helps”. This song is one that portrays a common story, although he does it in a way that feels personal and intimate in a way that is difficult to achieve.
Alexander 23 is someone who pours his whole story into each song and it is his raw honesty that connects me, and so many others, to his music. Not only is he extremely real in his music but he is also incredibly honest and humble in person. Speaking to him after the show was so incredible and he is just an amazing human being and that is present in how he carries himself. Alexander 23 is also extremely active on social media and interacts with his fans as often as he can, which I feel speaks a lot about his character.
If someone truly deserves what they have, it is Alexander 23. Keep reading to look into one of his newest songs “Hate Me If It Helps”:
Verse One:
I wonder if your therapist likes me
I guess it depends on how much of the truth you tell to her
And I wonder if your brother wants to fight me
Would he change his mind if he saw his big sister at her worst?
Verse one does a beautiful job of describing the situation in an honest way. Alexander 23 firstly claims the speaker’s role as the “villain” in the story which is evident in the first line. This placement is interesting because the “you” of this song is someone that the speaker has wronged and hurt. However, it seems that the pain impacted both parties as the speaker seems to be visibly heartbroken too. Alexander 23 also gets at the closeness of the speaker and their lover as he references the closeness of their families.
Pre-Chorus:
So tell your friends I’m evil
Write songs that say I suck
And roll your eyes when people ask about us
This section really opens up listeners to the theme of the song as the speaker grants their lover permission to hate him. Listeners also might be able to draw some connections of who Alexander 23 might be referencing as he says “Write songs that say I suck and role your eyes when people ask about us”. Hating him might be easier than loving the speaker and this is something Alexander 23 portrays beautifully.
Chorus:
You can hate me if it helps
Make me out to be the villain
Say you’re better by yourself
So it feels like your decision
You can tell ’em I’m the bad guy if it helps you sleep okay
Because all you want is closure, but there’s nothing left to say
So you can hate me if it helps
You can hate me if it helps
This section is where it all kind of comes together as Alexander 23 begins to fit the two narratives together. There is almost an ultimatum that exists in the chorus as the speaker gives his lover a choice. They can either move on with how things currently are or they can view the speaker as the bad guy which he realizes will likely be easier. It is hard to love someone and get over them so the speaker grants his lover permission to view him differently so they can move on, even if that means making the speaker the villain. Both parties obviously still care and Alexander 23 includes these details to make the story even more complicated. The speaker can be seen placing his lover’s needs over his own even as it seems the relationship is coming to an end.
Verse Two:
Do you wonder if I’m with someone new now?
If her clothes are in the drawer you used to take up in my room
Yeah, I bet you think I never think about
You anymore, and God, I wish that that were true
This verse has several specific pieces that add to the story of the speaker and their lover. This verse goes in-depth explaining and showing the relationship that ended. Details like “her clothes are in the drawer you used to take up in room” go straight to the heart. The speaker gets in their lover’s head and includes some assumptions of what they could be thinking. Lines like “Yeah, I bet you think I never think about you anymore, and God, I wish that that were true” are so relatable and I am sure that is part of why the song is such a hit. Alexander 23 portrays his own experiences in a way that allows them to be shared with his listeners in a unique way.
Pre-Chorus:
But I tell my friends I miss you
I write songs about how much
Yeah, I know we had our issues so if you want
The tone of the pre-chorus offers a look into the speaker’s point of view. It also seems as if the speaker leaves the choice of their relationship up to their lover by saying “if you want”.
Bridge:
I’m sorry I stayed up with you every night
For making you laugh when you wanted to cry
I’m sorry I paid for your SSRI’s
For making you happy I apologize
I’m sorry I put you in front of my friends
Yeah, my bad forgiving you for what you said
So go and be angry but you can’t pretend
‘Cause I know that you never would
‘Cause I know that you never could
Yeah, I know
The bridge offers a different tone from the rest of the song in terms of the emotions the speaker feels. The beginning of the bridge comes across as rather sarcastic and I kind of like the petty feel of it. There is also an undertone of possible toxicity as the speaker writes “I’m sorry I paid for your SSRIs for making you happy I apologize”. Listeners can tell that there are some pieces of the puzzle that are unresolved but I think that just mimics real life.
Outro:
But you can hate me if it helps
Yeah, you can hate me if it helps
It seems as if the speaker is laying out the ultimatum for himself as well. There is an undertone of regret and sadness for what is lost and it is clear that neither the speaker nor their lover will be satisfied with how things end.
Alexander 23 is someone that does not hesitate to share his story and I find this so refreshing and inspiring. Through his songs, one can follow his story and see how he has grown in his experiences and understanding of the world. He is very active on TikTok and Instagram and he hosts Instagram lives at least once a month on the 23rd, so I better see you there!