Dear Guydance,
My boyfriend & I recently broke up & we’ve been talking a lot since then and it feels as if nothing has changed. I know that we both want to get back together, but neither one of us will say it, what should I do?
Sincerely,
-Anon
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Hey Anon!
Okay, this is a great question and I think I may be able to get you in the right mindset before making this complicated decision.
First of all, breakups can be tough, and it’s important to give yourself time to forget the relationship and all that went with it. So take that time and spend it with your girlfriends, your best friends, or even the always-reliable gallon of Neapolitan ice cream (cause who doesn’t love options?).
There WILL be nights spent thinking about how much better things were when you were in a relationship, but take caution Anon, there is a reason why the breakup happened in the first place. It can be a total paradigm shift stepping back into single-life, but believe me it’s not all that bad. You have more free time, more money, and you don’t have to worry about getting in trouble for getting your flirt on.
I’ve seen too many couples get back together for the wrong reasons and it always ends with a fight and another breakup. At first it’s always something harmless, like late night texts, then you see them out with some friends and oh look, there are those damn feelings again. But it doesn’t matter! You’ve moved on and their sneaky attempts at making you jealous just make you laugh.
But don’t get the impression that getting back together is a horrible thing, because it can work out, too. My main point is remember why you broke up in the first place; deciding to get back together because you are both lonely will only end in more heartache. I might be stepping into my father’s shoes when I say there are plenty fish in the sea, but I think it still holds true. Spending time getting closer to someone new is worth more than losing months over a broken relationship.
I hope this helps, Anon!
Best Regards,
Jake George
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