Dear Shea,
It has been just over thirteen months since you first found out about your abnormal lab results. That very memorable day which feels like yesterday but also years ago. You have gone through a lot since that day, hospital visits, new medications, and certainly lots of crying. But here you stand today, stronger than ever because you made it through. I know that it has been a very difficult journey that was filled with overwhelming days however you can now sit back and reflect on the past year and all of it’s good and bad and everything in between. I am writing you this letter so that you can understand what to expect through it all including the really good days and the days that you never want to revisit.
There will be many surprises along the way. I mean who expects to have a bleeding disorder and a thyroid disease at the age of seventeen. Although your life is going to change in a lot of ways that you did not expect, there will be good alongside these changes. You will learn a lot more about the career field that you want to go into. Even though it may suck being a patient, you will understand how to better treat patients in the future. Also, you will get over your biggest fear, getting your blood drawn (trust me I know you will be the most shocked over this one). You will grow closer to your loved ones because you will find support in the ones who care about you most. Try to take in every unexpected moment and make it into something positive that you can grow from.
There will be many days where you feel exhausted and overwhelmed. Sometimes you can feel these days approaching, however some days will hit you unexpectedly. Learn to give yourself time to breathe and feel your feelings, whether it be emotions or plain symptoms. Do not try to force yourself to give 100% at all times especially when your body is telling you to calm down. The world will not see you as a failure, so you should not see yourself as that either. Kick that imposter syndrome to the curb. Yes, you may have chronic illnesses that sometimes feel like they are taking over your life, but yes, you will still accomplish your goals and dreams like the boss that you are. period.
Overall, I want you to remember to grow from this experience. Often you will question why you are having to experience this but remember that everything happens for a reason. One day down the line, you might or might not understand why this happened but you will notice how much you have grown from this experience. Remember that it is okay to feel down and soak in your emotions but to always let the good, joyful moments make up the majority of your time. Please remember to take care of yourself, whether it be getting an extra hour of sleep or having a dance party at midnight, because you will always be grateful you did later on. Finally, just remember that you will make it through this challenging part of your life because you are a strong individual who can persevere through anything.
Sincerely,
Your Future Self