Don’t “get cuffed” because it’s the trend. Understand these three things first.
It’s that time of the year again. In which family starts to ask, “are you seeing anyone?” or “when will you settle down?” This season is even deemed by society as “cuffing season.” The idea of having to date someone to bring home to your parents is very daunting and stressful. Here are some things to understand when it comes to dating and being committed this season.
Don’t Lose Yourself
Many times in relationships perceived on social media, there is this perfectness to the relationship. Ultimately we know this to not be true, but there is also an essence that this relationship is what defines two people. At the end of the day, that is what this couple is, two people in a relationship. Keeping your identity in dating and relationships is so important. You’re still an individual with different interests and different friends. Understanding that not everything with your partner will align with yourself is key to being happy in any relationship. Being in a relationship should not define who you are as a person. There is only one you, and only you can decide who you are going to be.
Communication
Being able to effectively communicate with someone, especially in a relationship, is key to your relationship’s happiness. Being able to effectively communicate boundaries and what you need from your partner will help provide the understanding and listening aspect of the relationship. There is nothing worse than being “heard” and still not being heard. This is why identity in a relationship is important. Establishing what you are comfortable with now saves a boundary being crossed later and the boundary should never be crossed. Communication also establishes trust in dating and relationships. Not trusting someone but still wanting to date them is a huge red flag. No relationships, let alone friendships, can be built if there is no trust.
Love Yourself First
Before you even enter into a relationship or the dating world, you need to love yourself first. It is not selfish to put yourself first. Knowing who you are and being able to be yourself unapologetically is the best thing you can do before you decide to share deep and emotional parts of yourself. Being able to completely and fully be yourself in a relationship is ideal and not being at a place ready to share yourself is okay too. It is being able to recognize where you are at in life and what you need. Loving yourself means taking care of your needs and wants. Those needs are not something to be compromised with.
Cuffing season can be rough for people not in a relationship because it means being questioned by family, friends, or seeing couples all over social media. Here’s the thing though, being single is perfectly okay and normal. Don’t date because “everyone else is doing it,” or you hate being single. Getting to know who you are by yourself helps you know who you want to be in the future. It provides an opportunity to understand what you want from life and to not settle for anything less. It’s your life and happiness, choose who and what makes you happy.