Pieces of advice from the smartest person I know!
My mom is my go-to for advice. Her emotional intelligence is through the roof and she is the kindest person I know. She is grounded, patient, and extremely thoughtful. When she gives advice to my friends and I, we call it “Molly wisdom.” I am known to repeat these OFTEN, because there is Molly wisdom for almost every situation. Here are some of her most frequent pieces of advice — maybe they can help you too!
1. Don’t worry twice
This one really helped me growing up. It’s simple but effective — a bit of a mind trick. The idea is exactly what it sounds like: don’t worry twice. For example, if you’re stressing about public speaking a week in advance, tell yourself not to worry about it now. You know you’ll worry right before the speech, so there’s no point in carrying that stress a whole week ahead of time. Save the worry for when it actually happens. The same goes for anticipating a test grade. There’s no use stressing about the outcome when the test is already over — the results will come either way, and you can worry about it then. Who knows, you might even do well and avoid the worry altogether! While this might not work for every situation, especially the more serious ones, it’s a good strategy for saving yourself at least some stress.
2. When someone shows you who they are, believe them
This is a quote my mom LOVES to repeat from Maya Angelou. The full quote is, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. They know themselves much better than you do. That’s why it’s important to stop expecting them to be something other than who they are.” She often shares this when giving relationship advice. Especially when you’re young, it’s easy to want to see the best in people and overlook red flags. But the truth is, people will show you exactly who they are if you pay attention. When they do, don’t ignore it or brush it off — believe them and act accordingly.
3. Don’t react right away (especially to be petty)
I’ve learned this one more through example. My mom always takes a moment before addressing something, and it consistently works out in her favor. I’ve adopted this approach and try to follow it as much as possible. I honestly can’t think of a situation where taking a moment before responding or reacting didn’t benefit me. This is especially true when it comes to pettiness. Being petty is usually an impulsive, emotional reaction. But when you pause for a second, you often realize that it’s not worth it. I’ve only ever seen pettiness come back to haunt people. It’s ALWAYS better to avoid it, even if it feels satisfying in the moment.
4. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable
I’m someone who tends to live with a lot of fear, so this message has come up for me a lot. The idea is that, to push yourself and achieve what you want, you have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. She also says, “A huge indicator of success is sometimes doing what you really don’t want to do,” which feels pretty similar, since it ties into embracing discomfort. While it’s simple, it’s a good reminder when you’re working toward something big. Great things don’t come easily!
5. 20 Seconds of Courage
There are plenty of other pieces of advice that could take the fifth spot, especially since I’ve already written an article on this one, but it’s something I think about often. It boils down to the idea that to tackle something scary, you just need 20 seconds of courage. For more, read my article 20 Seconds of Courage!
These are just a few tidbits of my favorite Molly wisdom over the years. While some may seem relatively straightforward, you would be surprised how much each one applies to different parts of life.