I’ll never forget when my mom told me: “never surround yourself with people that don’t make you feel good about yourself.” Even if you’re a part of a crowd of people – if you don’t feel like you can be yourself, then why be there at all? When I was young, I assumed that having friends means being with the coolest or most amount of people, but that is far from the truth. All you need is the number of friends that are equivalent to the number of fingers on one hand. Consider yourself lucky if that’s how many true friendships you form throughout your life. From my past three years of college, I started to truly discover the true meaning of a friend and the qualities I value most from those friendships. Here are the types of friends that you’re gonna need to survive this crazy world because I don’t know what I’d do without them.
- The friend that is just a phone call away
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Even in the middle of the night, I can call this person and they’ll be there to answer, whether I have a major dilemma or need someone to talk to on my way back from the library. This friend is usually one that is at another school miles away, but that doesn’t change our friendship at all. Even though we see each other in person only a few times throughout the year, every time we talk on the phone, the friendship picks up right where it left off. When you need to get away from the drama and stress of school, you can call this friend for an hour-long FaceTime call literally talking about nonsense.
- The friend who is like a mom
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You need a friend who is somewhat like a parental figure at college. They’re the person who is always looking out for your best interest and well-being, the one who always packs snacks in their backpack and will walk you home after a Thursday night out. If you don’t look good in an outfit, they aren’t afraid to tell you because they want you to be your best self! Honesty is highly valued in this type of friendship, and there’s nothing better than someone who is there to catch you fall.
- The friend you can go to like a big sister
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This is the friend you go to when you need advice or aspire to learn from. They empathize with you and can steer you in the right direction. You may even fight like sisters sometimes, but in the end, you both care for each other. You look up to them like how a little sister would, totally in awe of their wisdom and way they handle life. I don’t have any actual big sisters, so I really value my friends that can act like one, because a girl needs a sisterly figure in her life.
- The friend who is like a partner in crime
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Might I clarify, not a literal partner in crime, I do not suggest that! However, find someone you can go on crazy adventures with. Every time you meet up for lunch or coffee, the conversations always start with “Remember the time when…” You are a classic dynamic duo and you complement each other perfectly. Better yet, you might even be the same person! Like a twin, you both tend to be thinking the same thing at the same time. This is typically the friend you’re always tagging relatable memes to because you know them that well.
- The friend who is your polar opposite
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They say opposites attract and you always need that one friend who creates the perfect odd couple pairing. Even though they may have some different personality traits from you, they teach you to step out of your comfort zone. Sometimes having a friend different from you can help you branch out more. At times you both agree to disagree, but overall you always need that person who will teach you to try something new. Like a cat and dog, you’re not supposed to get along, but you do anyways because why not!
Hopefully, you can also see these qualities in your friends. We get to choose our friends, so choose ones that make you happy. It’s as simple as that. Most friends come and go, but there will be those few that stick around for a while. Those are the ones that are basically your chosen family. After all, the core group in Friends was only 6 people, so that goes to show an actual social circle is much smaller than you think. We’re always concerned about showing ourselves on Instagram as these social, popular people surrounded by a multitude of friends, but that’s not reality. Reality is the strong bonds you form with people that truly care about and respect you and vice versa. There’s nothing wrong with acquaintances though, just don’t try to pass them off as a competition for popularity or likability. Seek out true friendships that reflect your self worth and even though there might not be many, I promise, they will be the friendships that will last a lifetime.