Is There Such Thing As Healthy Gossip?
I LOVE to gossip, for a variety of reasons. Gossiping with your close friend about a problem that you’re having with someone can be therapeutic. And debriefing the latest celebrity drama can be light-hearted, silly and fun. Unfortunately, gossiping tends to have a very negative connotation. As children, we are constantly told gossiping is mean, it makes you a bad person and we shouldn’t do it. Despite these warnings from our teachers, our parents and others in positions of authority, most of us end up gossiping anyway. I think this is because it’s in our nature. Humans are social beings, and we love to talk, especially about each other. In no way do I condone spreading rumors about someone, and I do think there’s a line between healthy and unhealthy gossip. Still, I believe there are definitely benefits to the act of gossiping.Â
- It can help you solve issues
-
One big benefit of gossiping is that it can help us talk through our problems. I know that when I’m having trouble with a friend, for example, it’s really helpful for me to talk to someone outside of the situation (this is key) to help me gain perspective. Often, the person I’m gossiping with is able to give me much-needed advice on an issue, or just by the act of listening they validate my feelings.Â
- It can help strengthen friendships and relationshipsÂ
-
Another one of the biggest benefits of gossiping, in my opinion, is that it can bring you closer to the person you’re gossiping with. I know that gossiping has helped me see which friends I can trust. They kept what was said between us, and those who I can’t trust went and blabbed. I also know that when someone comes to me with information about someone else, I feel like they trust me and that makes me feel closer to them.Â
- It can make you feel less stressed
-
Finally, gossiping has definitely helped me relax and get rid of anxiety. When I have a conflict with someone on my mind, keeping it bottled up does not do me any good. Letting out how I feel by gossiping with another person is so helpful in releasing bad feelings and often just talking about a situation helps make it seem less stressful than it seems in my mind.Â
Gossiping overall is a nuanced concept, and there are certainly ways to do it in a healthy way and ways not to. As a girl who thoroughly enjoys gossiping, I’ve had some experience in learning how to gossip in a non-toxic way. Even so, sometimes I do catch myself talking about another person unnecessarily, negatively or in another way that I shouldn’t. I know that this is something that needs to change, but I don’t think that cutting gossip out of my life completely is the way to go about it. I believe there is a moderate, healthy way to participate in gossip, and I think the benefits I outlined above demonstrate this. Most of us can recognize harmless, positive forms of gossip when we see it as well as hurtful, negative gossip. By paying attention to why we gossip, we can do it in a good way, because there are pros to this act.