Fat Monica embodies the prominence of fat-shaming in the ‘90s
The show, Friends, continues to be remembered by many for its inexcusable flaws pertaining to sexism, objectification, and fat shaming, among other areas. Although I am an avid Friends watcher myself, I still certainly recognize these weaknesses throughout the show. In fact, there is one aspect that strikes an unpleasant chord with me in particular — Fat Monica.
Monica Geller is one of the six main Friends characters among Rachel Green, Joey Tribbiani, Phoebe Buffay, Chandler Bing, her brother, Ross Geller, and herself. Monica’s character also dabbles in playing “Fat Monica”, who is a past version of herself when she was — you guessed it — fat. Fat Monica is known best for her “hilarious” fat suit, her uncontrollable desire to eat just about anything, and her lack of coordination (especially when it comes to dancing). Sure, there are other notable traits she possesses, but none of them are appealing on purpose.
In the two-parter episode, The One that Could Have Been, the gang pictures what life would be like for Monica if she was still overweight. Particularly, they want to assess if Chandler — her boyfriend at the time — would have stayed with her despite her weight. The flashback also centers around the fact that Monica is still a virgin in her late twenties. So, it’s almost that if you were fat in the ‘90s, you were a slob with no coordination or decent social skills, and didn’t have sex. All this goes to say, Friends really missed the mark here.
Not only did the show demean and dehumanize Fat Monica, but this aspect of Monica’s past was used to taunt her throughout all ten seasons of the show. And let me add — it is consistently referenced, making it hardest for me to watch the show in general. In fact, I always skip episodes like The One That Could Have Been. Fat Monica only makes an actual appearance in her fat suit for four episodes, but Monica herself is made fun of in many, many more. Her brother, Ross, is a notable culprit as he ceaselessly highlights Monica’s heavier weight every time they discuss their childhood. In a Thanksgiving episode, The One Where Ross Got High, Ross and Monica tell on each other to their parents about multiple events of the past. Ross angrily proclaims that “hurricane Gloria didn’t break the porch swing, Monica did!”, insinuating that Monica could have literally done the damage of a hurricane. Afterwards, Jack Geller — their dad — says, “we kind of figured about the porch swing”. For the entirety of Friends, Monica was the victim of cheap jokes like this one that made everyone smirk or laugh, at only her expense.
Not only does everyone tease Monica for having been fat, but it is clear that she is personally and deeply affected. Therefore, Monica understandably struggles with food and a positive self-image.
In an episode, Monica won’t let herself buy any girl scout cookies in fear that she’ll spiral out of control and eat too many. Ross seemingly uses Monica’s emotions against her, leading her to cave in and buy boxes of cookies. Since Monica is constantly trying to silence the “fat girl inside her,” it certainly isn’t a coincidence that she happens to be a professional head chef. I believe Monica uses her career as a coping mechanism to overcome her complicated relationship with food.
Monica plays a rigid and overbearing character to compliment her struggles. She often seeks reassurance from others, worries extensively about her role in her relationships, and must have extreme control over situations. There is an episode where Chandler — now living with Monica — cleans the entire apartment in hopes of impressing her. However, he quickly realizes that he’s made a huge mistake because Monica will notice and freak at every slight and minor change, down to the exact placement of the furniture legs on the floor. This type of OCD-like behavior from Monica pairs well with her need to extensively control what she does and does not eat. It’s almost scary how accurate the producers were in constructing Monica’s personality.
I bet you’re now left wondering, Why in the world do you watch this show if you despise this aspect of its content so strongly? I started watching Friends only a couple years back because I didn’t believe that the hype was worth it. However, I found myself hooked as soon as the second season. While the ample fat shaming in Friends is a major issue, there are still reasons to like it.
For me, Friends is a “feel-good” show because there is never any seriously heavy or morbid content. And if a more serious topic is brought up, the characters turn it into a light-hearted and laughable discussion. I think many of us can appreciate and relate to this because our generation tends to use dry humor as a coping mechanism. What this doesn’t apply to is body shaming or targeting others’ appearance in general, but I rest assured seeing our society grow and understand this now more than ever.
Knowing that Friends aired in an entirely different decade when entirely different societal norms prevailed is why I can still watch it. I am able to compassionately understand that we have learned and grown since the ‘90s. Humankind is far from perfect. After all, body shaming still very much exists today even though it’s generally frowned upon. But if Friends aired now, it would be unacceptable. This starts the conversation of whether or not it is harmful for people to continue watching Friends and shows like it. Specifically, is my watching Friends reinforcing and appropriating the harmful stigmas that we are trying to get rid of? It is certainly something for me to consider.
Talking about and understanding the toxicity of Friends’ Fat Monica character is important today because we can, a) avoid making these mistakes (like fat shaming) in the future, and b) celebrate how far we’ve come as a society since this show aired. In the meantime, let’s please avoid being the Ross’s of the world and steer clear of body shaming.
Episode Sources
Crane, David, and Marta Kauffman. “The One That Could Have Been.” Friends, season 6, episode 15, NBC, 17 Feb. 2000.
Crane, David, and Marta Kauffman. “The One Where Phoebe Runs.” Friends, season 6, episode 7, NBC, 11 Nov. 1999.
Crane, David, and Marta Kauffman. “The One Where Ross Got High.” Friends, season 6, episode 9, NBC, 25 Nov. 1999.