People change, so their surroundings and involvement will too
People constantly grow in their knowledge, emotions, and passions. Growth is a powerful change to endure as an individual, as one understands that their values and priorities shift over time. Experiencing new people, situations, and environments makes a person adapt and gain new perspectives. With this, a person may decide that a person, organization, or activity that they previously prioritized no longer requires their attention. When this happens, society views this shift in what a person dedicates energy towards as quitting. However, this is far from the case. Rather, it should be viewed as someone growing out of something and transitioning into a better use of their time. It’s like growing out of a pair of pants, why wear ones that are the wrong size when your body has changed, and you can find a comfortably fitting pair?
Society has built a negative connotation around the concept of quitting. It implies that an individual is giving up and not pushing themselves hard enough to succeed. Quitting is meant to mean physically leaving something, however, it socially means much more. The word “quitting” is associated with not persevering through hard situations to get to the good times. Even when people use quitting positively, such as encouraging someone to quit a job they hate, it still implies that they’re abandoning hope and the responsibilities they committed to. However, people need to realize that quitting isn’t always the idea of quitting that society holds! There needs to be a new concept advertised and widely accepted, the idea of growing out of things. Whether this is a relationship, a job, a club, or anything else, people change and their environment can only be expected to change with them.
I have stopped participating in clubs I used to be a part of, ceased talking to friends who I thought were the best I would ever find at the time, and even dropped majors I declared. However, all of this stopping was not what people told me was quitting. I have since come to realize that I simply grew out of these activities. As I changed and experienced more opinions, people, and places throughout my life, I grew out of certain things. The word people attributed to my actions, quitting, wasn’t what I held to be true, and didn’t describe what was actually happening.
When you have decided that you have grown out of something, you have to trust your gut. I learned that turning to the internet for advice was of no help. I was flooded with the idea that the true gems are the ones who stay. What message was that telling me? That I wasn’t a gem in the world? I have decided to adopt the opposite philosophy. I have come to understand that growing out of something has made me more of a gem. My experiences have shaped me and made me a tougher person going forward. I know what to value in my experiences and passions going forward. I not only have a better understanding of what will serve me best long-term, but how to care for myself in my social and alone time.
In conclusion, I think the best way to think about growth is what our mind goes directly to, the growth of a plant. When you pot a plant when it’s first sprouting, you may use a small pot. However, it grows as it receives water, sunlight, and care. Eventually, the original pot isn’t large enough for its roots, so it must be transferred to a larger pot, so it can continue to grow and develop into the healthiest version of itself. The plant grew out of, rather than quit, its original pot. We’re all plants, just like the one I described. We grow out of our original pots as we grow, develop, and change. This is a normal part of transitioning throughout life. So, instead of beating yourself up for “quitting”, reframe your mindset and view it through the perspective of growing out of something.