Navigating Tinder can feel like a landmine — between swiping right, swiping left, updating your profile pictures and having conversations, this app can easily take over your life if you don’t know how to use it effectively. HC came up with some basic Tinder guidelines and answered all of your questions about the mobile dating world. Want to win at Tinder? Check out these tips!
1. Post realistic photos of yourself
You wouldn’t want a guy who Photoshops every picture of himself to look more muscular or attractive, so why present yourself as someone you’re not? The same rule applies for your Tinder photos, collegiettes. Ditch blurry pictures or pictures where sunglasses hide your face. “A picture which is 3/4 or full-length shows him you have nothing to hide,” says Jasbina Ahluwalia, founder of dating site Intersections Match by Jasbina.
Ashley McDonald, a senior at Central Michigan University, says, “I met my boyfriend on Tinder in May, and he’s amazing. My advice: Post pics that are realistic (not overly filtered).” Presenting yourself realistically on Tinder will get you the matches who like you for you!
Ahluwalia says that three pictures is a good amount to have. “The first pic should be your best – if he doesn’t like your first, he may not check out the rest,” she says. “Your first picture should be of you alone – no one else should be in the picture – you want him to know what you look like, and definitely don’t want him distracted by others in your pic.”
Ahluwalia also suggests having a photo of you engaging in an activity that you’re passionate about. For example, if you love traveling, include a picture of you in front of a landscape; if you to ski or play tennis, include a picture of you having fun doing so.
2. If the conversation is going well, start texting
If conversation doesn’t flow naturally between you and your match, you might struggle to keep a strong relationship in the future. You should include your interests and passions in your profile so that it’s easy for your match to engage you, Ahluwalia says.
“Ask questions in your communications to engage him,” Ahluwalia says. “At the end of a convo, let him know you had fun. Also consider letting him know something you’ll be doing to keep the dialogue going, i.e., ‘Got to go now, had a great time with you, meeting up with my girlfriend to attend a book reading.’ Consider adding more books, movies, music to increase chances of shared interests.”
3. Don’t overthink your conversation (but be aware of timing)
Your boldness can pay off, collegiettes! Starting conversations with your matches almost always works to your advantage. There’s no reason not to take a risk now and then; we know that you text guys like a pro.
“If a boy doesn’t message me on Tinder, I always just message him!” says Ashleigh Pierce, a sophomore at the University of Cincinnati. “What’s the point of matching if you don’t talk? If they don’t respond after a few days, I un-match them!”
Ahluwalia says that “while you don’t necessarily need to initiate a conversation immediately, at the same time, if you artificially hold off on responding ‘too soon,’ he can very well just move on.”
Additionally, “I would be careful regarding initiating convos late night on weekends (unless you’re seeking a hook-up),” Ahluwalia says.
The stakes are low on Tinder; don’t overthink it! “You don’t have to be clever or funny,” says Erica Avesian, a recent graduate from the University of Michigan. “I swiped right, sent, ‘Hey, what’s up?’ to a cute guy who I probably would have approached at a bar, and after a few weeks of talking, he asked me out for a drink. We’ve been dating for almost a year now.” You never know what positive benefits could come from just being friendly.
Stuck on what to say to him? Try these flirty texting tips.
4. Don’t be afraid to block him
If you met a creepy guy in person, you would totally walk away. The same rule applies for Tinder! Our Tinder-savvy collegiettes recommend not being afraid to block guys who give you the wrong vibe. There are literally no consequences to deleting someone who gives you a weird feeling, so get rid of the Tinder creeps.
You should block a guy “if there’s a clear mismatch between your and his relationship goals, such as you’re looking for a relationship and his profile and/or communications indicates he’s looking for a hook-up,” Ahluwalia says.
Erica agrees. “Just stop answering their messages or delete them if they get annoying or creepy,” she says. There’s no point keeping around guys you’re not into!
“Honestly, the best way I’ve found to ditch a guy you’re not into is to block him!” says Devon Hoffman, a sophomore at Colgate University. “Literally with one swipe, he’s gone. There are some creepy guys out there!”
Don’t give the creeps the time of day. As Jay Z says, “On to the next one!”
5. Meet up only under certain circumstances
Where should you go to meet up with your match? “In a public place, for low-commitment drinks or coffee,” Ahluwalia says. “Not at your place.”
Meeting up in person can be a stressful experience, so don’t rope yourself into something complicated, like an elaborate dinner or a day trip. “Choose a low-key first date such as coffee, or a meal at a casual restaurant,” Ashley suggests. “For my first Tinder date with my current boyfriend, we went to a Mexican food restaurant and then took a walk in a park – it was laid-back and it made for easy conversation.”
Devon also stressed that meeting up with people with whom you have mutual friends is safer than meeting up with total strangers. “I met up with someone on Tinder who I had a lot of mutual friends with, and we got ice cream,” Devon says. “It was super casual and relaxed. Although it’s a little jarring to meet up with someone you met on Tinder, take the risk! Make sure to meet up at a public place like a restaurant so he knows you’re not just a booty call.”
Tinder can be intimidating place for a single collegiette, but we hope you’ve learned some tips that will keep you from obsessing over the small stuff and focusing on the good stuff: meeting awesome guys or girls! Did we forget any key tips, collegiettes? Post in the comments below!