Content warning: This article discusses cyberbullying. I don’t know about you, but I spend a lot of time online. From YouTube to Instagram, there are an almost overwhelming number of ways we can connect to other people using the little handheld computers we call cell phones. As you read this, chances are you’re doing so while connected to the internet. But, as many of us know, this seemingly endless method of communication has its dangers, including cyberbullying.
While cyberbullying is a term most people associate with teenagers, it can happen to adults and college students too. According to research from the Pew Research Center, over half of children have been targeted by cyberbullies — and 40% of adults. This number is even higher for adults under 30, two-thirds of which reported online harassment of some kind. Further data shows that identity components such as race, gender, or political views can increase the likelihood of online harassment.Â
To learn more about dealing with cyberbullying as an adult, I talked to Anja Mack, a therapist, and Dr. Rostislav Ignatov, Chief Medical Officer at The Haven Detox.Â
The anonymity of online spaces can enable bad actors, and sometimes people are perfectly comfortable with being known for saying rude, insensitive, or mean things. “Cyberbullying is the act of posting, sending, or commenting false or hostile content about another person,” Mack says. “It is present in the form of social media posts, shares, and comments, and typically ends in the embarrassment and humiliation of the victim.”Â
Be aware that while most people associate cyberbullying with social media platforms like Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, or Facebook, it can take place almost anywhere online. Dr. Ignatov notes that cyberbullying can occur “even in online games like Roblox or Fortnite.” The anonymity of these platforms can enable cyberbullies, since they can easily hide behind screens and remain anonymous, they can be much more vicious and cruel, thinking that there will be no consequences for their actions,” Dr. Ignatov said.Â
Mack notes additional ways that cyberbullying differs from traditional forms of harassment. “Cyberbullying is different from in-person bullying because there’s such a large audience,” she says. “Cyberbullying is also normally impulsive, meaning content is made off-the-cuff in an attempt to hurt another person. It’s often more hurtful than the pre-meditated act of in-person bullying because so many people can see and interact with the attack. Sure, there can be an audience when there’s bullying in-person, but not nearly at the caliber of the internet, where everyone can see.”Â
The scope of cyberbullying can affect your mental health in a myriad of ways, similar to in-person bullying or harassment.Â
HOW CAN IT AFFECT YOU?Â
Dr. Ignatov explains the way that cyberbullying can cause extreme stress and anxiety, stating, “Victims [of cyberbullying] may feel like there’s no escape from the bullying, even in the safety of their own homes, and this can trap them in a cycle of fear and helplessness.” He adds, “When people live in this constant state of fear and stress, like they always have to watch their back or that everyone’s just out to get them, they are bound to develop anxiety, depression, or other mental health issues.”Â
Due to the 24/7 nature of the internet, experts warn that cyberbullying can feel much more constant than traditional bullying, which puts increased pressure on the victim and exacerbates problems that arise.Â
WHAT CAN YOU DO TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF?
“My first tip is to tell someone — preferably someone you trust and feel comfortable talking to, like a parent or a close friend,” Ignatov says. “Many people get scared to tell anyone because they fear the bully’s retaliation or that the situation will get worse, but staying silent only gives the bullies more power. Tell someone and ask them for help in dealing with the situation: Bottling up your emotions and trying to handle it alone can be incredibly overwhelming and detrimental.”Â
On telling close confidants, Mack adds, “Not only can they provide support, but they can help you track what’s being said and done so that you have proof that this bullying is happening to you.” She continues, “They can help reassure you that what a bully is saying about you isn’t true, and let you know you’re not alone. Isolation is what bullies want you to experience, so build a support group to help you stay positive in the midst of negativity.”
In addition to telling other people if they’re being harassed online, both Mack and Dr. Ignatov advise victims to keep a record of the attacks in order to have evidence if they need to make a case about their experience.Â
Finally, do not engage with cyberbullies. “Most of the time,” Mack noted, “if you ignore the attacks, the bully will often stop.” Dr. Ignatov recommends taking a social media break to limit your exposure to bullying, and practice self-care by doing things that make you feel good.Â
HOW DO YOU COMBAT CYBERBULLYING?
“Report to the appropriate authorities or social media platforms,” Dr. Ignatov says. “Nowadays, most platforms have strict policies against cyberbullying and provide ways to report and block users who engage in such behavior. Don’t be afraid to use these tools to protect yourself and others from harmful individuals online.”Â
Keeping a printed or otherwise offline record of the attacks can help with this, particularly if the bully takes something down after the fact. Remember to take care of your mental health early to prevent worse consequences, and log off completely if you need to.Â
Cyberbullying can have devastating effects, and is unfortunately common in today’s world. Take care online and remember to be kind, and if you know a friend or family member is struggling with cyberbullying, find ways to support them the best you can.Â
If you or someone you know is seeking help for mental health concerns, visit the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) website, or call 1-800-950-NAMI(6264). For confidential treatment referrals, visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) website, or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP(4357). In an emergency, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK(8255) or call 911.