When youâre in a long-term, serious relationship, you know that it can only end in two ways. Either youâll spend the rest of your life with this person, or youâll break up.
The first time you go through heartbreak is usually the hardest. When youâre young and in love, it may feel like the end of the world when your relationship fades or one person no longer feels the same way. Falling out of love with your SO can be difficult, especially in college when youâve got so much else to balance on top of dating.
Whether youâre going through your first break up or have experienced your fair share, you may find it comforting to hear other breakup stories from college women whoâve lived it too. The truth is, weâve all been there and most of us can relate when it comes to falling in and out of love.
If youâre in a relationship thatâs not going well and youâre wondering how you can prepare yourself for the pain that may be coming your way, just know that youâre not alone. Hear from 8 college women whoâve been through hard breakups, cause theyâre so ready to get you through this tough time.
Here’s what they had to say:
“I met my partner in college and we hit it off immediately. I felt like the only girl in the world for him. But then, his best friend called me asking me to have coffee with him, and he told me my SO had been seeing other girls. When I confronted him, he denied the whole thing and before I could break up with him, he dumped me and left. I was angry I didn’t get the chance to say it first. It took a couple of months for me to get over it completely. I wanted to show my ex how good I was so I started to get more social by joining clubs, internships, and taking risks. Because of my break-up, I found new ways to love myself!â  – Katrina, Sonoma State University
âMy experience was so sudden. My initial reaction was shock. I had never felt that hurt before and I tried hiding it from my family and the world because I felt embarrassed, as if something was wrong with me. I made a mental note of the pros and cons of the relationship and what emotions made me feel and thatâs when I decided that it was time to let go. I also deactivated my social media accounts for the summer to really focus on myself.â â Angelina, North Carolina Agricultural & Technical State University
âEvery one of my friends saw it coming except for me, who was trying everything I could to hold onto a relationship that was disintegrating. Talking it out made me feel better. I cried it all out with my friends and I also found a new hobby to devote my new found time to that allowed me to do something worthwhile rather than spending that time thinking about him.â â Jade, Howard University
âWe dated for almost two years and he had been my best friend for seven. It was the summer going into first year of university and I wasnât sure if I wanted to do long-distance. I started thinking about him as more of a friend than a romantic partner, which is something I struggled with for months before we broke up. I broke up with him, which was really hard, but we decided to stay friends. I âserialâ dated a lot of people and that honestly made me feel better and eventually, I moved on. We remain really good friends and have a lot of respect for each other, even though we have gone in separate pathsâ â Joanna*, Western University
âIt was one of those situations where everything was perfect on paper, but not in reality. It was devastating, even though I could see it coming. I put more effort into class and sports, I got really into reading about successful women, and I learned conversational Welsh. I think I was fully, or at least partially, over it when I saw the effects of my hard work.â â Stephanie, University of Wisconsin
âMy first breakup was definitely a doozy, as I was the one being broken up with. I depended on the people around me a lot the following months, and they gladly took me in with open arms. I would say to anyone going through a breakup, look to those around you for love and acceptance. Donât be afraid to lean on your best friendâs shoulder or to cry in your momâs arms, regardless of your age. Listen to those around you. Listen to their advice, especially those who have gone through heartbreak before.â â Erynn, Central Washington University
“I was able to rely on my friends to help keep me preoccupied with other thoughts. I also recommend sticking to your schedule as much as possible in the days post-breakup. As you move on, youâll be happy you kept following your alarms and attending those meetings.” â Rebekah, Gettysburg College
âThe more days that pass, the more moments I have where Iâm perfectly fine.â â Aly, Ithaca College
While experiencing breakups can be one of the greatest pains you endure, itâs important to keep in mind that the pain will not last your entire life. Many women find that it helps to talk about your feelings and process your emotions. Itâs not healthy to suppress your feelings, but you also shouldnât let your sadness stop you from living your life.
*Some names have been changed.